# Cheer me up with your competition epic fails



## slumdog (27 October 2013)

Only went a bloody fluffed up the second to last fence in the jump off! Did a super tight turn (I'm too competitive for my own good) and suddenly though ***** wrong fence, no, ***** right fence! By which time I had to do a circle. G jumped fab and would have gone clear, jockey needs a bloody sat nav! Our first BS show as well so I was so angry at myself! 

Please cheer me up and tell me I'm not the only one who has made stupid rider errors!


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## 3Beasties (27 October 2013)

We got a four in a prelim dressage test today, nuff said! :redface3: :biggrin3:


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## Mince Pie (27 October 2013)

3Beasties said:



			We got a four in a prelim dressage test today, nuff said! :redface3: :biggrin3:
		
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Not that it's a competition (boom boom!) but I once got 3 x 3's in one test - mare either went sideways or bucked up each of the 3 flaming centre lines  Judges comment: think this one prefers jumping!


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## LEC (27 October 2013)

Going wrong in tests
Jumping the wrong fence
Missing out a fence
Getting lost
Not doing my girth up and falling off after the last fence before the finish line
Turning up on the wrong day
Turning up to the wrong venue
Missing the finish posts
Starting before the bell
Not wearing gloves
Carrying a whip
Falling off at the first fence


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## Pigeon (27 October 2013)

Got 42% in one of Pip's first dressages. I don't think we went slower than canter once...


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## charlimouse (27 October 2013)

Being bucked off mid dressage test. 
Had a 0 for an incorrect canter strike off. 
Not making it in to the dressage at a BE Novice ODE due to being bucked off and knocked out whilst mounting.


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## JFTDWS (27 October 2013)

Eliminated at 2nd fence in a 50cm sj class with the highland, 3 years ago.


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## slumdog (27 October 2013)

LEC said:



			Going wrong in tests
Jumping the wrong fence
Missing out a fence
Getting lost
Not doing my girth up and falling off after the last fence before the finish line
Turning up on the wrong day
Turning up to the wrong venue
Missing the finish posts
Starting before the bell
Not wearing gloves
Carrying a whip
Falling off at the first fence
		
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Brilliant


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## dafthoss (27 October 2013)

Having jumped the course all ready in the previous class for some reason I decided to turn left down the related distance not carry straight on to the fence I was supposed to jump. The fact some one was stood in front of it and I had to tell them to move didn't even seem to register until I had jumped it and was really confused about the impossible line to my next fence. 

Competing the YP is an embarrassment every time without me having brain failures.


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## nikkimariet (27 October 2013)

I have to admit the time I cantered down the centre line, halted and loudly announced '****' in a Prelim is pretty memorable.


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## Jane_Lou (27 October 2013)

K did her best ever dressage and then jumped an amazing double clear in her 2nd ever BE100. Sounds good you say, what could possibly be wrong with that......... Falling off between the last fence and the finish...... That's what!

Oh and broke her leg to boot! See, yours was nothing ;-)


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## sychnant (27 October 2013)

I learned the wrong dressage test - only Intro level! That was embarrassing... Especially as at the previous competition I'd learned the right test, but forgot it twice then retired


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## slumdog (27 October 2013)

Jane_Lou said:



			K did her best ever dressage and then jumped an amazing double clear in her 2nd ever BE100. Sounds good you say, what could possibly be wrong with that......... Falling off between the last fence and the finish...... That's what!

Oh and broke her leg to boot! See, yours was nothing ;-)
		
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Ouch! How did she managed that? No that's true, at least my poor horse just ignores the idiot on top and gets on with it lol!


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## khalswitz (27 October 2013)

Been thrown off at the first fence... twice.
Started before the bell
Gone in circles because I couldn't remember where I was going - both in SJ (understandable) and dressage (less so)
Gone into a show class and started riding round before realising that it was the inland before the ridden...
Getting to a show and realising I didn't have a girth.
Forgetting gloves.... multiple occasions.
Forgetting which colour jumps we were meant to jump xc... so jumping whatever we fancied at each. Thankfully unaff so we didn't even get asked to stop, we just merrily carried on...
Imperiously telling a girl riding far too close to watch out, couldn't she SEE my red ribbon... to realise my friend was waving said red ribbon at me from outside the warmup...


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## paddi22 (27 October 2013)

oh god, I still have nightmare flashbacks to mine!  First hunter trial on a new horse and I got unseated at fence three in front of everyone. hung on over the side of the neck upside down for a while,  while hearing the loudspeaker saying 'oh is she off?, is she off?.. yes she's off now' My top pulled up under my bodyprotector, so there was just a layer of squashed belly flab visible (very attractive!) . I only have power in one arm so I can't mount off the ground and the horse wouldn't stand near a fence as the next competitors kept jumping past. The only person who could give me a leg up was a very very very tiny short skinny man. I was about 3 times the size of him so it took about 10 pathetic attempts to get me up! He kept trying and was only getting me up a foot or so. Eventually he did it, but i'd say he has serious back pain to this day!  I just cringe any time i think of it!!


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## keepitugly (27 October 2013)

Left the dressage arena several times mid test on various baby horses. One time pony was falling out in canter and I just couldn't correct him and he fell over the dressage board which went flying, finished the test then got off and put the dressage board back whilst shouting sorry to the judge. They marked us very generously, must've felt sorry for us!


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## keepitugly (27 October 2013)

Another special one was not being able to get a 17hh gelding over a plank on the floor in a clear round and eventually being asked several times to leave the arena as we were holding everything up. Horse had jumped up to 1.20s previously, jumped fantastically at home and in the warm up. Someone had told me they'd tried the week before and he was terrible but I thought, no no, he'll be fine, they're talking rubbish. My bad.

Don't work for dodgy dealers, the amount of embarrassing experiences I've had out and about are numerous, you learn a lot though!


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## Elf On A Shelf (27 October 2013)

When I was about 10 I had my wee Shetland in a First Ridden class at a show. Round we went, grand, got placed, fine. Went back in for the Novice Ridden. Walk, trot, left hanging on the ring ropes whilst my ****land galloped off up the hill back to the trailer and his buddy. The judge was looking round for the Shetland that she was sure was in the class only to see me trudging back up the hill to retrieve said little sod!


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## Lolo (28 October 2013)

I got a 73 dressage at an ODE once, my horse 'wasn't ready for dressage'. He was 25, and I was left wondering if he'd ever be ready... 

He was prone to being a nappy sod at times, and on too many occasions we'd get stuck at the start or at the first turn away from home. He was a complete tool about it, and only did it to wind me up and succeeded perfectly! He held all the cards because if I hit him he'd just mess about for longer, if I overdid the kicking and growling he'd take me home, and so I had to sit it out. Only just sitting it out makes you look utterly useless as a rider...

And my piece de resistance... 

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=1279957446136&set=vb.1446041645&type=3&theater

A crashing fall. This was a 'confidence boost' outing following a nasty fall 2 weeks earlier, I was still a bit battered and was very shaken from it- my first not-silly fall in 3 years off this horse, and it had knocked me for 6. I was very tense and stressed, and got to fence 4 before this got too much. You can't see so well, but what I do it literally throw myself over the fence a stride before takeoff. My poor horse slams into reverse to avoid jumping on top of me and it's a disaster all round... Not the desired effect!!


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## OwnedbyJoe (28 October 2013)

Been bucked off at "X"... Bolted with XC and flew past the start box going in the wrong direction yelling apologies at the top of my voice... Eliminated for swearing in a PC event.
Good friend of mine got run away with in SJ once and was heading straight for the judges box: they were so convinced she was coming in the window they leapt out of the box! She stopped just in time...


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## PolarSkye (28 October 2013)

Oh sooo many  . . . let's see . . . 

- Very first competition (an eventer's challenge at Rogate/Fairoak) he refused the first fence in the SJ, nearly unseated Z refusing at the third fence and then made a complete "bottom" of himself in the XC - we lost count of how many times he reared in front of one fence, he nearly sat on the bonnet of a fence judge's car and then jumped a duck (yes, a real live duck) on his way back through the woods.

- At our very first stressage competition (Frensham Manor) he escaped from the lorry and tried to leg it down the drive, it took three of us to put his saddle on b/c he was so spinny and silly, judge exclaimed as Z rode into the arena "aaaahhhh the escapee!," judge declined to beep her horn because he was so tense and he produced some very explosive canter work (in an Intro test) - even the photographer was laughing by the end of his test because he was so naughty

- At Tweseldown in March he got a zero in the stressage for striking off on the wrong canter lead

- At Wellington he was so spooky in the dressage that Z forgot where she was going (the workmen in the corner didn't help) and the judge recommended she start again and she could go HC

- At Crofton Manor he decided it would be great fun to spin and wave at the crowd/show them his tummy EVERY time he went into the main arena

- XC schooling at Boomerang, having just spent a good 90 minutes bouncing round the XC course, he decided it would really good fun to go round again - broke the baler twine by the lorry and headed back off to the course - we had to ask Sarah Stretton (yes, the event rider) who was heading out to the course on one of her horses if she would mind "parking" across his path/catching him (she did, but wasn't amused) . . . this was in front of Dan Jocelyn, Yogi Breisner, Laura Collett and Nicky Henderson who were all there schooling just prior to the beginning of the season . . . oh the shame .

Does that help?

P


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## Daytona (28 October 2013)

Burgie 3 day event , I was in 5th place over night after the dressage, next day was steeplechase , I'd been round track one and was coming for the 2nd lap when for a reason unknown to me in a fast canter my horse decided to slam the anchors on resulting in me ending up wedges in the fence upside down and stewards pulling me out.......







A photo just as the drama started to unfold lol


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## Oscar (28 October 2013)

Tried dressage on my poncy Arab when I was younger, he was a star at home and worked at Elem/Med level.  BUT try and do a prelim at local riding club, on grass with white boards & flowers was a mission.  He took the words warm up outside the arena a bit too literally, I couldn't get him within half a mile of the boards!! And when the judge beeped her horn I think we ended up about 4 fields away.  Didn't even make it up the centre line.


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## montanna (28 October 2013)

Think it must be a first BS thing!
My first one on my previous horse, I managed to make him stop (horse NEVER stopped!) at a triple bar, fence three!
The next class was a qualifier with over 70 in it.. I walked the course, and there were 14 fences (two phase!).. Said to bf don't let me forget last fence! What did I do... miss the last fence!!!!! Would have won it aswell. Was absolutely gutted!
At least things ccan only get better eh!


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## tinap (28 October 2013)

Daughter did a blinder at the Trailblazers finals a few years back. 

Went into the 1.05m championship final 2nd day in joint 1st place with 4 others knowing she had a very good chance of getting placed.  They jumped the first 4 fences lovely, came round the edge of the arena to turn to No.5 & he was just slowing a little so she gave him a squeeze. He mistook it for a 'let's go' squeeze & so jumped what was infront of him - unfortunately this was the arena fence back into the collecting ring!!! Daughter was gutted & wasn't best pleased with me because i was in stitches  she could never complain that the pony wouldn't jump anything infront of him


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## *hic* (28 October 2013)

Took a new horse for a dressage test. He was very green and fairly stressy. Warm up was, um, interesting but we survived. When we were called he trotted round the outside of the arena once, boggling at the boards, the markers, the other arenas, the sky, the other competitors, the stewards, you name it, it got boggled at. We got round and started our trot up the centreline and as we just about got to X he noticed the judge's car, apparently for the first time. Cue spreadeagled halt at X in horror, got him going again but he was stiff-legged walking up to C rocked right back with his head out, eyes on stalks, nostrils flared, snorting and blowing at the car. As the writer moved a piece of paper he spun and legged it. I managed to keep him in the arena but after that he refused to go nearer C than EXB and would only walk in a wiggly stiff-legged line towards it but would try and run away as soon as we turned back towards A. I didn't know where to put myself, I was laughing so much. We were last, the judge didn't eliminate us as she was laughing too much at my efforts.

I swore I'd never take him to another test - that was some five years ago and he's been off injured much of that time. This winter I have promised myself that I have a goal to take him out and do some more dressage with him. I must be mad! (But he's back in work and we ARE working on it!)


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## Chirmapops (28 October 2013)

0 for an incorrect strikeoff sounds a bit dodgy from the judge - were they BD registered? 

Yesterday we got the full range of marks for our Novice test from 8 down to 1 (the point where I retired because hailstorm had sent horse into hysterics). Got a grip on ourselves for the Ele though thank God.


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## JustMe22 (28 October 2013)

So many!

Took my loan horse (mad mad TB) to an agricultural show. Massive mistake, he is terrified of cows. I knew there would be cows there so not sure what I was thinking but he spent the entire time galloping about madly until we got disqualified and nearly ran over the judge. Dressage he did 6 flying changes on one circle. Comment said 'no flying change required'. Was a prelim!

Took my first horse to the same show the following year as a 4yo right off the track and he was equally abysmal , reared up and struck out at me with his front legs and caught my jaw (luckily no damage) in the showing. Dressage was incident-free but was warming up just trying to canter a circle but horse was very tense..somebody walked past and commented on my lovely half pass.

Sister's pony at same show went into the dressage (with me) and was not impressed at the grass arena. He's never been worked on grass and we did the whole test at a fast canter. Judge knows me and so asked me if it was a jumping pony..had to say no, it isn't...he is in fact a dressage pony, despite what this might lead you to believe.

I have never gone back to that show, thank god!

Also once got a 40 or something at novice dressage champs when my horse ran backwards out of the arena, kicking over the fence as we went...they let us continue, for some odd reason!

We've had a lot of mishaps! I promise I am not as bad as this post makes me sound, however!


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## sportsmansB (28 October 2013)

I was riding a horse at prelim for a friend. he was quite big and weak, we couldn't work him too much to warm up as he just died when he went in.. 
I worked him a bit in the warm up & said friend said ' that'll prob do him'- i thought he was still a bit strong and SHOULD have spoken up but just agreed... 
Went in, trotted round arena, a bit looky but not too bad, bell goes, turn for C/Line - his mate whinnies from the lorry at the end behind the judge and he galloped, flat out, down the CL towards the judge. 
Managed to get him stopped at fence behind judges car ( we went over the boards) and she was peeing herself laughing but said ' would you like to start again? I will have to give you an error of course though, I can't see how else to mark that entrance!' I said that was very kind- and when I went back in he was dead as a dodo, could barely maintain canter...


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## Baggybreeches (28 October 2013)

Being in a 2 horse members race against a horse with a very iffy completion record and going the wrong way? Having to pull up and reroute and hunt round for 3 miles on your own?


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## chestnut cob (28 October 2013)

So many but the one that sticks out in my mind... not walking my XC course properly at a ODE this summer, because I'd schooled around it the month before so thought I knew where I was going (was a PC event and they hadn't changed the course from the BE event, and I'd schooled around the BE course).  Cue me missing out fence no 8 because I'm an idiot, and getting a TE.  Taught me to walk my courses properly from now on, and I now take pics of each fence so I know I've walked them all!


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## PolarSkye (28 October 2013)

Oh and Z tells a fab story about competing one of her (many) event horses for the first time at dressage - horse was very stressed, lost the plot and jumped the bonnet of the judge's car . . . judge's comments on the sheet were something alone the lines of:  "what a jolly test, nice to see such enthusiasm, but perhaps stick to jumping "

P


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## wyrdsister (28 October 2013)

PolarSkye said:



			Oh and Z tells a fab story about competing one of her (many) event horses for the first time at dressage - horse was very stressed, lost the plot and jumped the bonnet of the judge's car . . . judge's comments on the sheet were something alone the lines of:  "what a jolly test, nice to see such enthusiasm, but perhaps stick to jumping "

P
		
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Hehe, glad it's not just mine who's done that! Years ago, yellow pony and I were show jumping at a local event, practicing to see if he'd go back to BSJA after getting sour in a previous home. He took a dislike to the first fence (a 2'6" basic rustic), threw himself out the side door, took off with me and, when I tried to circle him to stop, he jumped the ring ropes and the judge's car in one giant leap. We were at the other end of the showground before I managed to pull up. I'm not sure who was paler, the judge or my poor mother!


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## dianchi (28 October 2013)

Highlights include............
32% dressage test (conducted in one half of the school!)

Being eliminated at SJ-
Falling off at first fence (after winning class before)
Failing to get through the start gates (didn't even get to first fence)
Having fastest time at championship in JO- missed out a fence!

List is endless, weve all been there!


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## Twiglet (28 October 2013)

At my first showing show with my old boy he flipped out, bucked, took off at speed, jumped the string out of the collecting ring (his eyesight was better than his attitude at that point) and headed full pelt down a grassy bank before I managed to turn him around. Got him back to the warm up dripping in sweat, friend offered to get on him to try and resolve the situation, as soon as she had mounted he stopped dead, refused to be ridden, led, moved or backed up (all the while my Grandad calling helpfully from the ringside "try taking the handbrake off love, it worked last time!"). We ended up having to drag him from the ring, and spend the next 3 hours attempting to get him back on the lorry. Bless him....lovely lovely boy but he did noooot like showing. 

Main disaster with new boy was in between jump two and three in an 80cm at Pachesham - he had PMT or a hangover or something, decided he wasn't going to play ball, swerved out of the exit of the school, sending me over his shoulder on to a metal fence and a bollard, kicking me on the way down and kindly rupturing my hamstring. And this is the well behaved one 

At our first ODE I 'slightly' misjudged a canter circle in the dressage, leaving the QEII sized Buzz about three inches to turn in canter before the white boards, so instead he used his imagination in jumping the length of a board to remain almost in the school. How it wasn't seen or commented on by the judge i have no idea. Good warm up for the SJ though


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## only_me (28 October 2013)

When was younger pony was quite strong, coming too fast for my liking towards the water jump (just a drop in) pony dead set on continuing!

ended up leaping into water, slipped on landing and pony and I both ended up under the water swimming - we both emerged from the water covered in green algae and soaked to the bone!

I did get back on and finished rest of course with a huge lump of algae hanging from my hat


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## Charem (28 October 2013)

Can think of loads though most memorable was when we were in the lead at BE event on a 22 dressage. Horse was a little tricky xc but had walked it and it was very straightforward so thought it would be a breeze. First fence was a very small simple brush, horse got hugely excited in start box rearing/bucking ect. Came flying out like a pro and then promptly dug his heels in and refused to go anywhere near first fence. Little git!


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## chestnut cob (28 October 2013)

Oh, and at a HT recently, I jumped 1 and 2 perfectly, remembered my line and swung a wide left for the next lot of fences.. coming up to the 5th (hadn't presented, I was about 20m away) to see the fence judge yelling at me from his car... instead of going straight on, I'd swung my wide left one field to early and missed out an entire field, including fences three and four.  I got so confused by the fact they'd put flags across part of fence 2 (the 100 and 80 fences), was trying to work out what was going on and completely forgot I was only on 2, not fence 4.  Had to turn around and go back in the opposite direction.

The pony an absolute superstar, he jumped clear with a big smile on his face, but I am an idiot.


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## ArcticFox (28 October 2013)

lots of things!!

this year though, I jumped the wrong side of the flags at a drop fence, then jumped the wrong side of the flags over a ditch.  both times meant the jump was mahoosive!!

I decided I'd give up and go home at that point!


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## humblepie (28 October 2013)

This would be over 30 years ago but...pretty big three day show, jumping the Junior Open, pony who was somewhat too strong for me locked onto a fence and jumped.  Only problem was a double with a parallel out or the way we jumped it paralell from wrong direction, one stride to an upright!  Whoops.  It wasn't the only time we jumped the wrong fence but did have lots of successful days as well.


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## lizness (28 October 2013)

My friend got bucked off in a showing class got back on and carried on without the judge noticing.


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## khalswitz (28 October 2013)

lizness said:



			My friend got bucked off in a showing class got back on and carried on without the judge noticing.
		
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That's good going. For her, not the judge, obv. Pretty poor from them.


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## PolarSkye (28 October 2013)

Twiglet said:



			Main disaster with new boy was in between jump two and three in an 80cm at Pachesham - he had PMT or a hangover or something, decided he wasn't going to play ball, swerved out of the exit of the school, sending me over his shoulder on to a metal fence and a bollard, kicking me on the way down and kindly rupturing my hamstring. And this is the well behaved one 

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I was there and remember thinking OUCH when you hit that fence.  

P


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## DressageCob (28 October 2013)

I took my horse to an unaffiliated dressage competition for our first ever prelim test. It was all going well until we were on a circle at C in the canter. As we went from X to the track and around back to C my horse locked onto the perimeter fence. He bounced over the white boards and then leapt over the post and rail fence, right next to the judge's car. 

We've improved somewhat since then...in dressage at least


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## EmmaB (28 October 2013)

Once at a 65cm class...refused every warm up fence, refused first fence twice, refused another fence twice, got eliminated but let me carry on, refused start of a double, jumped first half then ran out of second part and I fell off. Went home in shame. The next week, same class but this time I got ran off with twice and had to pull up to a dead stop twice in order to gain control. Then forgot to jump the last fence, que epic sharp turn back to it, almost crashing into wings. 

Also once got 40% in a prelim. Awful!


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## Lynds (28 October 2013)

At Little Downham this year the dressage judge made us have a vet check as our dressage was so dismal she thought the horse was ill. I told her he was always that reluctant to trot circles. .. ! any way he woke right up in the showjumping warm up, vet laughed at horses cleverness and we ended up coming 9 th at be100 with a fast clear xc!


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## Fools Motto (28 October 2013)

So many! Pretty much all the above has happened to me in one way or another!!

But, I do remember being at Stonar Schools ODE, and in the pouring rain, on a very non dressage pony, trying to do dressage. All was going well, as well as expected, down the centre line, stop, salute, continue, C track right... BEEEP. So I stopped. Sure I knew I was right. After an age of me standing there in shock, the judge finally got out and asked what was wrong! I then said I had gone wrong as I got beeped, with a no you didn't, yes you did panto style argument!  Only after that, did I realise it was the arena next to me that beeped. For my error, (and argument) I got something like 80penalities, = true shocker!  
Never mind, I'm on a jumping machine, make up some places in the next phases. For the first time ever (and only time), pony had other ideas, and by fence 3 SJ I was elim. Well, should have stayed in bed that day!!


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## fatponee (28 October 2013)

Brilliant stories : )  How does everyone stay positive and keep on trying after their fails?


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## KidnapMoss (28 October 2013)

Soooooooo many

Falling off within 7 seconds of entering the ring at Devon county show...

Walking a course taking my pony showjumping for the first time and treating it as a schooling exercise, didn't walk the jump off as he was bound to stop...he flew round clear and I had to retire cos I didnt know the course....

Getting eliminated before I even entered a dressage arena, pony refused to go in....

Getting bucked off in a lap of honour in a hoys qualifier....

Pony kicked a paramedics car...

Oh god there are so many. But in all the years I've owned him, I'm pleased to say the good outweighs the bad!!!!!!


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## Hoof_Prints (28 October 2013)

I've own some horses with a lot of character  so I have a few epic fails..

- pony's first ever competition after her tendon injury (was dressage) at a venue she normally jumps at. Unfortunately they use the same buzzer for the start of a dressage test as well as the start of a jumping round- cue pony thinking she was jumping and leaping 3ft in the air and cantering off 

-another dressage one, I was going to a canter circle and suddenly forgot where I was going so stopped dead, realised I had to circle at E (i'd just gone past!) so for some reason I thought 'must not turn a circle' and rein backed to e, then cantered my circle  I don't think I even read the sheet! Wish I had now though ! 

- Oh another dressage fail.. (I should give up on dressage) my horse is normally very good and responsive when warming up, but at this particular point he decided he was going to charge around everywhere and had to be schooled on a death grip- (think a few different riders riding him had upset him- he's very sensitive! ) So he went in to the dressage ring, cantered on the spot and then charged out of the ring  took a good month of intensive reschooling to get him out of that !

-When I first got my ISH he was scared of jumping and panicked, took him in the jumping ring at one of his first shows and he jumped the first fence, locked on to the arena fence and I hadn't got a choice about where I was going next! - over the arena fence and down the driveway. He did this 3 consecutive times before I eventually got him round a course !

-Passed out in mid air over a fence, landed on my head and was knocked out cold. Came round after a few minutes and concussion meant I couldn't move my arms or legs so I thought I was paralysed for a minute or two, scariest moment of my life.

-Jumping an amazing round at quite a bit charity event a few years ago, pony was on top form and going clear. I forgot the course on a related distance.. how that is possible I have no idea as the jump was right in front of me  but I went round it instead.

-Was going round a course, there was a jump right in front of the seats where a lot of people were watching and pony refused, I went flying... and landed in clear view of everyone !

- Turned up on the wrong day to a show, was a dog agility show instead... How stupid did I feel with a trailer on the back?! Quickly made a phone call to see what other HORSE shows were on and re-routed 

I could think of more, but I'm getting quite embarrassed at myself so I will shut up now


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## Marchtime (28 October 2013)

My worst I think are:
- Showing a racing Shetland in a M&M class. The person getting him ready shined his neck with baby oil. We all set off trotting and next thing I know I'm flying round overtaking everyone. The reins had got baby oil on them so I couldn't pull up. The judge kept asking me to stop, as if I had a choice in the matter. He eventually tired out and I had to leave the class. He did regularly win racing though and I never allowed baby oil near him again
- One of my first events with my pony, I was meant to be doing the 2ft3. I came through the woods and saw a fence with the right number on. It happened to be the 2ft9 coffin but we sailed over it anyway. Sadly we got eliminated both for error of course and because the cowbag wouldn't jump another ditch later on!
- Many embarassing times at Merrist Wood with the horse. He refused to leave the warm up and enter the arena. Every time I had to dismount in the warm up, walk him in to the arena and get a leg up. Everyone always looked very confused but he point blanked refused any other way.
- Same horse did not take to cross country. One particularly memorable time he stopped half way round the course. Not at a fence, just in the middle of the course. He refused to move for a good few minutes. Other horses flew by but he was quite content watching. We gave up eventing soon after.
I think judging by everyone's stories it is par for the course!


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## EllenJay (28 October 2013)

Daytona said:



			Burgie 3 day event , I was in 5th place over night after the dressage, next day was steeplechase , I'd been round track one and was coming for the 2nd lap when for a reason unknown to me in a fast canter my horse decided to slam the anchors on resulting in me ending up wedges in the fence upside down and stewards pulling me out.......







A photo just as the drama started to unfold lol
		
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WOW!  That is one hell of a stop - the skid marks go back a mile!!

My best ever competition epic fail was when I invented Extreme Dressage.  This was a Prelim 10, and my test proceeded as "Enter at A in working trot, after 2 strides, bolt up the centre line, veer right and jump the white boards.  Proceed to gallop through the other 3 tests that were going on in same arena, causing mayhem in my wake, return to A and trot up the centre line to salute to the judge.

I was eliminated with the judge very kindly stating "I don't think you were in complete control through that movement!"


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## wench (28 October 2013)

All with the same very naughty, self opinionated horse:

Henry deciding he couldn't be bothered with dressage so he jumped around to the left in the middle of a right rein circle and tried legging it to the gate of the indoor arena. What a shame the gates were closed and my mate was there to give me a leg up. Got an applause at the end of that test he was that awful and a score of about 40%.

Henry deciding he was in a really good helpfulood, and he knew which jump was next on the course. A parallel from the wrong direction. But hey he jumped it which was better than his normal antics of running out at every fence. 

Henry deciding that he couldn't be bothered jumping one day at sj, sand as the. Gate was just comvienient to run to between two parts of a double we did that instead of the second part of the double.

Henry deciding dressage was boring and stooping on fee walk on a long rein to eat the grass in the arena.

Henry deciding he couldn't be bothered with one of the jumps at a hunter trial so went to run out. Big mistake Henry, there was a massive pos and three rail fence next to the jump, so we cleared that instead.

Henry deciding he knew which way to go in an endurance ride and having a tantrum a he thought he knew best. Then just to show me he was annoyed he set off as fast as possible in the direction I wanted to go in.

Henry deciding he didnt really fancy going around a BE90 xc course, and dumping me on h the landing side of the third fence. He then buggered off back to the lorry park. Worst off all, no dirt on my cream jods and no massive bruise to prove I'd fallen off.

Henry getting eliminated at his last dressage competition before he killed himself. Decided he couldn't be bothered that day and teied leggin t put of the arena, again.

And finally, on a different horse... ODE sj... Trigger was to busy groping out of the sj arena. Didnt see the tiny jump in front of him. I went sailing over his head steughtinto he jumps. Poles and wings came collapsing down on top of me and the steward came running over... I think they thought it was quite nasty. As it was I was happily extracting myself from the pile!


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## BeckyD (28 October 2013)

Oh god. I have more embarrassing tales than non-embarrassing. 

* Eliminated at first fence for 3 refusals then bucked off whilst riding toward arena exit

* Working hunter pony class, had to jump a small fence at the end of a corridor they had made out of fence panels. I got bucked off cleanly over the fence panels, pony then carried on, jumped the little fence then came and double barrelled me when I tried to catch him. 

* Lost control in JO and jumped a fence in the wrong direction, carried on and ran into string, which came with horse and dragged a whole lot of spectators over. 

* doing a dressage test facing the hedge up one side of the arena. Managed to do almost all movements facing it. Including circles in reverse. 

* Repeatedly galloping away from judge during one test every time we got to C

* missed SJ fence at BE

* jumped wrong fence SJ at BE

* Fallen off in front of first XC fence at BE

* Fell off several strides in front of 2nd fence at first go BSJA. 

* prelim 4, jumped the patch of dead grass from a jump filler left lying there too long near X, on every trip up or down the centre line. Very neatly done, at least. 

* Stopped in middle of first BD elementary, did a doodle in the air with my finger to figure out where to go next, then carried on. 

Many many more too, as anyone who has seen my out takes video can testify to.


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## slumdog (28 October 2013)

These are great! Henry sounds hilarious and I can just imagine doing a doodle in the air to remember which way to go! Haha


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## clairebearnz (29 October 2013)

I, aged about 12, once borrowed a friend's pony (classic pony club Open eventer/hunter pony) for a tiny handy hunter course where we had to canter sedately around a tiny XC course then halt in a keyhole at the other end. Dear pony took over control as I was bloody useless, sedately cantered around the course, through the keyhole, and straight over the full wire fence at the end of the paddock. 

She cleared it easily. I promptly fell off.


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## andytiger (29 October 2013)

Went showjumping it was 2 phase got eliminated in first class couldn't remember the way  thought I'll be alright in next class they won't change the course
they changed it walked the course twice still couldn't remember it  got eliminated again missed a fence out  what a idiot 
I've also learnt the wrong dressage test trotted down center line and wondered why the bell rang when I tracked right instead of left


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## EveningStar (29 October 2013)

Oh I've had a few. Most become from me being super dopey

Not going through the flags at the end of a jump off- missed out on a ribbon. Then about 2 months later I missed the start flags! 

Missed a jump on the Xc at my first ode

Got a 62 dressage at an ode. We didn't even do anything wrong! 

Started sj before the bell


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## FinnishLapphund (29 October 2013)

andytiger said:



			Went showjumping it was 2 phase got eliminated in first class couldn't remember the way  thought I'll be alright in next class they won't change the course
they changed it walked the course twice still couldn't remember it  got eliminated again missed a fence out  what a idiot 
I've also learnt the wrong dressage test trotted down center line and wondered why the bell rang when I tracked right instead of left
		
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I see a pattern in your epic fails...  

Personally, I don't have any fun story to share, as the rest of the posters on this thread. The closest that I can think of, is from a summer riding camp. The last day we had some fun sort of gymkhana games, but the pony that had been "mine" during the camp, was lame in the morning, so instead they put me up on a youngish pony, which was clearly out of my riding ability league. Let's just say that I steered and he decided the speed...


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## Twiglet (29 October 2013)

PolarSkye said:



			I was there and remember thinking OUCH when you hit that fence.  

P
		
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I remember thinking ouch when I hit it too  Horror of a day, not sure I've forgiven him for it yet!


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## Cheshire Chestnut (29 October 2013)

Paid £35 to jump BSJA 'on a ticket' at a BSJA Christmas show, then £25 for a class with my TBX chestnut mare. Got in the indoor ring and there was a giant Santa in an inflatable snow globe in the corner near the first fence (that you couldn't see from outsde the ring). She wouldn't go near it and ran backwards for ages. We got asked to leave the ring before we'd even started. Cringe, never went BSJA again!!


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## fattylumpkin (29 October 2013)

That's bad luck Cheshire!!  I'm sure yours wasn't the only one to spook 

My biggest fail isn't so epic, but it felt epic at the time!  There was a show coming that the yard was going to turn up for as a united team.  Most of us were taking jump classes.  At the time I was riding a lovely little 13hh welsh pony and we'd been flying over jumps like no tomorrow.  Because I was young, stupid and thought ponyo and I were invincible I signed up for the 120 class.  The yard all piled into the lorry and we got there at a nice and early 9am.  My class was one of the last in the day at 4pm!  So all day ponyo and me swanned around the show grounds, cheering on friends (who all did extremely well) jumped a clear round (or ten).

Around 2 o clock the rest of the yard was done and counting their rosettes and trophies, so they were all there waiting for me.  Yard Manager gently suggested I might've signed up a bit beyond ponyo's abilities and tried persuading me to sign up for a nice 90cm class instead that was due to start much earlier, but no, I was DETERMINED.  The weather turned from sunny and warm to windy, drizzly and freezing and my class was delayed half an hour for some reason or another.  Cue my getting looks from the other folks on the yard who all wanted to cram into the lorry and speed home.  But no.  I was still determined.

When the class was eventually called I rode up to the arena with everyone else and noticed that me and ponyo were on an eye level with everybody else's kneecaps, not another pony in sight.  That was the first inkling I got that maybe I'd made a big mistake.  Ponyo was also sick and tired after the day he'd been through and decided to try and roll on the grass with me twice while we watched other people do beautiful clear rounds.  YM and the rest of the yard were shivering on the sidelines looking miserable.  When my number was called I suddenly turned chicken and couldn't go in because I knew I'd messed up big time.  I started to sidle off but YM flapped at me and said "There she is!"  so I swung ponyo around and in we went.  Could feel some extremely puzzled looks from pretty much everybody as I cantered into the ring.

First fence was a refusal, then he went over.  Took the second fence, the third, and refused twice at the double and we were out.  I was crying with humiliation at this point, fully aware it was self inflicted, and cantered out of the ring.  But I do remember all the other competitors on horses very kindly clapping on our way out   Cantered straight to the lorry and put my boy inside and he gave me a look that said "don't do that again".

On the way home a friend tried cheering me up by offering to give me her 1st rosette to take home to my mum and the waterworks started.  I've never signed up for a class higher than 100cm since!


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## FinnishLapphund (29 October 2013)

Cheshire Chestnut said:



			Paid £35 to jump BSJA 'on a ticket' at a BSJA Christmas show, then £25 for a class with my TBX chestnut mare. Got in the indoor ring and there was a giant Santa in an inflatable snow globe in the corner near the first fence (that you couldn't see from outsde the ring). She wouldn't go near it and ran backwards for ages. We got asked to leave the ring before we'd even started. Cringe, never went BSJA again!!
		
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You're not the only one that has gotten into trouble at Christmas competitions. I think that it was Malin Baryard-Johnsson that one year, had problems getting one of her horses to enter the arena during Globen Horse Show, due to her horse seeing the Christmas decorated fences. Looking like for example (photos found through Google image search):


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## Cheshire Chestnut (29 October 2013)

Haha well that makes me feel a bit better. She wasn't really the spooky kind but if she got something in her head then she was a nightmare! God love her. Ah well, I'm sure Malin Baryard-Johnsson had possibly paid a tad more than me to do the same thing so I don't feel quite so bad!!


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## Jenni_ (29 October 2013)

I've had many blips during competitions, but the most embarassing would be falling (or sliding!) off a 12hh gymkhana pony, in trot when I was 15.


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## Kikke (29 October 2013)

Few years back. Went to change rein in medium trot, madam suddenly got a bee up her bum and off I went. Don't really want to fall off mid competition


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## Javabb94 (29 October 2013)

When I was about 9 I had waited around about 4 bourse for my class think it was open m+m workers. The course had Been the same throughout the day so I didn't re walk before my class. Went in and got confused at about fence 4 when the numbers were different! Went to judge and apologised and left the arena! 

I was eliminated at fence one of a BE (XC) horse was not playing ball! Have cracked it now though! 

Have managed to canter my way though an entire walk and trot dressage test also


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## monkeybum13 (29 October 2013)

When I was younger getting a -2 for a late transition in a walk and trot test was a bit of a fail!


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## Doormouse (29 October 2013)

I did an hunt relay on my fathers horse who was an old Grade B show jumper. He cat leapt all the nasty rustic fences then when we went to hand over the whip he galloped straight past the person I was trying to give it to, out of the ring, flat out down the horsewalk, 2 circuits of the lorry park, back up the horse walk, managed to fling the whip at the person who set off to do their round, my horse then continued flat out round the ring and jumped out over the ring ropes, 2 motorbikes, turned in midair and deposited me on the bonnet of a car!

I didn't get asked to do anymore hunt relays after that, cant' think why!!!!


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## claire_p2001 (29 October 2013)

slumdog said:



			Only went a bloody fluffed up the second to last fence in the jump off! Did a super tight turn (I'm too competitive for my own good) and suddenly though ***** wrong fence, no, ***** right fence! By which time I had to do a circle. G jumped fab and would have gone clear, jockey needs a bloody sat nav! Our first BS show as well so I was so angry at myself! 

Please cheer me up and tell me I'm not the only one who has made stupid rider errors!
		
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You think thats bad!  I was at the Blue Chip finals in the JO and was going so well on to possibly win the class and turned back to the last fence and fell off evidence here if you would like a laugh 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TR_on0jehRw


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## montanna (29 October 2013)

claire_p2001 said:



			You think thats bad!  I was at the Blue Chip finals in the JO and was going so well on to possibly win the class and turned back to the last fence and fell off evidence here if you would like a laugh 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TR_on0jehRw

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Ohhhh no! I bet you were gutted! Showjumping for you!


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## Kikke (29 October 2013)

claire_p2001 said:



			You think thats bad!  I was at the Blue Chip finals in the JO and was going so well on to possibly win the class and turned back to the last fence and fell off evidence here if you would like a laugh 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TR_on0jehRw

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 I do not like laughing on other peoples be halve but  I love your horse just looking at you like " what did you do that for ?" 

Always good to know we are all together in making fools of ourselves


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## Stormy123456 (29 October 2013)

On Saturday we turned up to a competition after the class I wanted to do had finished.. Didn't even get the nag off the box!


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## claire_p2001 (29 October 2013)

montanna said:



			Ohhhh no! I bet you were gutted! Showjumping for you!
		
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Kikke said:



			I do not like laughing on other peoples be halve but  I love your horse just looking at you like " what did you do that for ?" 

Always good to know we are all together in making fools of ourselves

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Yes I was gutted at the time and now I look back and laugh everytime I watch it!  I know poor horse he was so sweet rubbish rider cost him the class


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## Pippity (29 October 2013)

fattylumpkin said:



			My biggest fail isn't so epic, but it felt epic at the time!
		
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Oh, god, I really feel for you on that one!

My first ever show, I was about six years old and riding a four-year-old Welsh B belonging to a friend of a friend of my mum's. I was so excited I think I'd got about half an hour's sleep the night before.

I don't come from a horsy family at all and none of us had any idea what I should wear, so my mum laid out my best, aunt-knitted, woolly jumper with a picture of a horse on the front. I turned up at the show in my bright red woolly jumper, and it was hastily decided that, no, I wouldn't be going in a showing class, for obvious reasons!

The only lead-rein class I was vaguely appropriately dressed for was lead-rein handy pony, so in we went. This was towards the end of the day, so the pony and I were both tired and overwhelmed. I was painfully aware that I was dressed completely WRONG and just wanted to go home, but didn't know how to say so.

The first element was walking across a mattress. The pony took one step onto it, stopped dead, and I promptly burst into tears, while my lead-rein wielder (the daughter of my mum's friend) did her best to pretend she wasn't with me. Thankfully, at that point, the judge took over the lead-rein and led the pony through the rest of the course, with me clinging to the pommel. I even came out of it with a rosette - fourth out of four!

It was a very, very long time before I went into *any* kind of ring again.


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## Morgan123 (29 October 2013)

Pippity said:



			The first element was walking across a mattress. The pony took one step onto it, stopped dead, and I promptly burst into tears, while my lead-rein wielder (the daughter of my mum's friend) did her best to pretend she wasn't with me. Thankfully, at that point, the judge took over the lead-rein and led the pony through the rest of the course, with me clinging to the pommel. I even came out of it with a rosette - fourth out of four!

It was a very, very long time before I went into *any* kind of ring again.
		
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Oh god - that reminds me of some long-blanked out memories my first pony - she just used to lie down in the middle of showing classes when she got bored....was horrendously embarassing for my eight year old self....


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## glamourpuss (29 October 2013)

claire_p2001 said:



			You think thats bad!  I was at the Blue Chip finals in the JO and was going so well on to possibly win the class and turned back to the last fence and fell off evidence here if you would like a laugh 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TR_on0jehRw

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That is brilliant! I love the way your horse is stood there saying 
'Huh? Where did you go? What happened?'


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## lynds81 (29 October 2013)

Going XC in the BE at Shipton Moyne (PN I think?) where you had to jump two cutaway walls on a 90 degree turn, jumped the first and the horse wouldn't turn so I jumped the non-cutaway wall to the side of the one I was meant to jump.. It was massive!

Going XC on a different horse - it was his first event in 3 years (ex 3* eventer that a friend bought as a schoolmaster for PC that promptly injured itself really badly) jumping round a PC Open.. Jumped so big off a drop that he disappeared through a gap in the hedge without turning so my only alternative without crossing my tracks was to jump the post and rail fence and hedge back. That wasn't such a fail though because we were still 2nd!

Being in the lead after DR & SJ at the RC National Junior Championships and missing fence 4 on the XC! My team won anyway (we had an amazing team that year!), but standing in the arena being congratulated and given sashes and trophies was truly mortifying when I knew I'd completely screwed up...

Trotting down the centre line of a dressage test on my 12hh pony and being bucked off in front of the judge whilst the pony took off back to the lorry.

Trying to do a really tight turn in a jump off and jumping a completely seperate fence (that wasn't even in my class, it was up for the next one) backwards. It was a triple bar...

The list could go on but that's all I can think of for now!!


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## xDundryx (29 October 2013)

Trying to read these in work and can't help snorting into my coffee trying not to laugh.. I too have too many to name..some of the more recent ones were, first time competing at RAF Championships last year, jumped the first part of a double, my horse swerved so I pulled him back and we collided and pretty much nose dived over the 2nd part, a spread resulting in me doing a nose dive into the dirt (someone very kindly captured the sequence on camera) worst bit was my dad had flown over from NI to cheer me on and help out, he ended up running around salisbury plain after the ginger one!Err at a recent jumpcross comp at quite a prestigious stud we were bowling along nicely and I swung the ginger one round to go up a bank and into a water element and we promptly slipped , I again took a nosedive knocked myself out and spent 6 hours strapped to a spinal board still in my stinky xc gear..horse was fine he used me for a padded landing just a couple of cuts to his leg..felt like a right wally, havn't been back there since!!At Swalcliffe ODE there was a delay waiting to sj so my hothead neddy (generally exciteable anyway) pretty much boiled over, we reversed into the sj arena then he exploded like a rocket, managed to get round in one piece only for the burger van people to express their relief at my safe exit from the ring to my OH..


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## slumdog (29 October 2013)

fattylumpkin said:



			That's bad luck Cheshire!!  I'm sure yours wasn't the only one to spook 

My biggest fail isn't so epic, but it felt epic at the time!  There was a show coming that the yard was going to turn up for as a united team.  Most of us were taking jump classes.  At the time I was riding a lovely little 13hh welsh pony and we'd been flying over jumps like no tomorrow.  Because I was young, stupid and thought ponyo and I were invincible I signed up for the 120 class.  The yard all piled into the lorry and we got there at a nice and early 9am.  My class was one of the last in the day at 4pm!  So all day ponyo and me swanned around the show grounds, cheering on friends (who all did extremely well) jumped a clear round (or ten).

Around 2 o clock the rest of the yard was done and counting their rosettes and trophies, so they were all there waiting for me.  Yard Manager gently suggested I might've signed up a bit beyond ponyo's abilities and tried persuading me to sign up for a nice 90cm class instead that was due to start much earlier, but no, I was DETERMINED.  The weather turned from sunny and warm to windy, drizzly and freezing and my class was delayed half an hour for some reason or another.  Cue my getting looks from the other folks on the yard who all wanted to cram into the lorry and speed home.  But no.  I was still determined.

When the class was eventually called I rode up to the arena with everyone else and noticed that me and ponyo were on an eye level with everybody else's kneecaps, not another pony in sight.  That was the first inkling I got that maybe I'd made a big mistake.  Ponyo was also sick and tired after the day he'd been through and decided to try and roll on the grass with me twice while we watched other people do beautiful clear rounds.  YM and the rest of the yard were shivering on the sidelines looking miserable.  When my number was called I suddenly turned chicken and couldn't go in because I knew I'd messed up big time.  I started to sidle off but YM flapped at me and said "There she is!"  so I swung ponyo around and in we went.  Could feel some extremely puzzled looks from pretty much everybody as I cantered into the ring.

First fence was a refusal, then he went over.  Took the second fence, the third, and refused twice at the double and we were out.  I was crying with humiliation at this point, fully aware it was self inflicted, and cantered out of the ring.  But I do remember all the other competitors on horses very kindly clapping on our way out   Cantered straight to the lorry and put my boy inside and he gave me a look that said "don't do that again".

On the way home a friend tried cheering me up by offering to give me her 1st rosette to take home to my mum and the waterworks started.  I've never signed up for a class higher than 100cm since!
		
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To be fair, that takes some serious balls lol!


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## tiga71 (29 October 2013)

My first ever show jumping class, it was this year at 75 cm. We were third to go and I thought I had asked all the questions I needed to and knew the course. Bell went and off we go. Approaching the third fence and I hear the tannoy saying my name and horses name. I thought, 'Rubbish, I have done something wrong.' And I pulled up in front of the fence. Then my friends shouted, 'No they are announcing you, keep going.' Ohhhhh - they hadn't announced the first two riders so wasn't expecting it. Rode round and approached fence again and horse went, 'Nooooo, this is clearly a bad fence, you stopped me jumping it just a minute ago' and flipping stopped. I managed to stay on and took him round again to shouts of 'ride him forward' - I did and the git stopped again. There ended my first SJ competition despite loads of work going into it. I was gutted but did die laughing once I had got over the humiliation. I just wasn't expecting to hear my name over the tannoy. 

Lesson learnt - do not stop unless someone grabs your reins, even then I might just keep riding


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## MagicMelon (29 October 2013)

- Have been chucked off during my final salute in a BE novice dressage test, horse galloped off back to my mum. 
- Have fallen off at the first fence in two BSJA classes (same day).
- Have been eliminated from a dressage test for leaving the arena too many times!
- Came very close to being eliminated in my dressage test at the RC Champs (a 10 hour drive for us one way!) for forgetting...
- At a BE novice, I jumped the wrong part of a corner (didn't see the third flag) so eliminated myself (would have been 2nd).
- On a few occasions I've jumped the wrong SJ fence, 3 times I can think of I got the very first fence wrong!


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## Chloe_GHE (29 October 2013)

falling off in the car park whilst trying to get on

landing in mud, so couldn't even hide my shame! hahahahha


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## MagicMelon (29 October 2013)

I also remember entering the arena for a BE dressage test, down the centre line and then turned the wrong way!  That was very embarrassing but in my defence, the XC was running right by the dressage warm up so my horse was like a rocket - every time I even touched his sides he'd leap about everywhere so I went in riding for survival!

Chloe_GHE - I've also fallen off in the car park.  Was just swinging my leg over my Welsh D and he suddenly did the biggest bronc on the spot which sent me flying through the air and smacking head first into my trailer - scratched my GPA in quite a big way which was irritating!  Think horse got stung by a bee or something as very very odd for him to do that, he then wouldn't let me on at all after that so we gave up and went home!


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## Orangehorse (29 October 2013)

My gymkhana pony used to regularly buck me off when I was getting on, this was only at a show and generally if we had won a heat and I had to get back on for the final.  She only did it once and was OK the rest of the time.  Strange, just remembered that.  Does anyone do gymkhanas anymore?

However, my most recent epic fail was to ride into the Main Arena at a County Show for a showing competition with my horse's boots still on.   I thought I had lots of time but realised as I approached the collecting ring that my class was going in, so rushed to join in.  He was well ridden in then!  I should have stopped by the collecting ring and asked someone to take them off when I realised but I thought by then it was too late and just carried on.  Bottom of the line..


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## j1ffy (30 October 2013)

This thread has really cheered me up about my own competition fails (sorry guys ).  Here are a few of mine, though I'm not sure how epic they are...

- Back in the day on my 14.2 (my first pony), I forgot to wait for the bell in our first SJ competition...and went clear of course; another time we jumped a fence the wrong way when he locked on and I could do nothing about it.  Generally all rounds looked more like a hurdle race than SJing!  Oh, and once I was doing pairs xc, I saw my mum by the course and wondered where my stepdad was.  I was so busy wondering that I cantered straight past the next jump.  We'd have won if it hadn't been for the run-out...the other half of the pair never ran with me again!
- In a SJ jump-off on a loan horse, I attempted a tight turn in a jump off.  The horse managed the turn, I didn't.
- My first (and only) BD comp with my PRE, I foolishly took off my over-trousers before removing his travel boots and ended up with a smear of horse ***** down my breeches.  Classy...
- I can also join the 'cantered through an Intro test' club
- My Hong Kong horse was so badly behaved at our early competitions that I retired from our first Prelim test when he decided to reverse instead of walk, and we managed 47.5% in our second.  We regularly get 'calmly ridden' comments from the judge!


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## chestnut cob (30 October 2013)

And another one... I once fell off during a DR warmup when horse spooked... and managed to break my finger :/


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## ihatework (30 October 2013)

I probably have far too many to remember correctly LOL!

I have without a doubt done all the usual - starting before the bell, missing a fence, going the wrong way etc.

A memorable one was competing in the Petplan festival and getting bucked off mid test in front of 2 judges. V. embarrassing.

I also had a particularly dodgy event horse once. I remember in foot and mouth year falling off 4 times in one ODE. Once trying to croos the F&M mat on the way to dressage warm up, once in the dressage warm up, once in the sj warm up and once on the way to xc start. I also managed a 47 dressage, 20 sj plus numerous time faults that day. It was not my finest competing hour!

On the same horse, another day I managed a clear SJ, was carted rapidly towards the exit, brakes slammed on - reared, landed over the rope with front legs and pulled the entire ring down .....

I am now older and wiser and only choose to ride nice safe horses!


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## MiniMilton (30 October 2013)

I have many epic fails, but the most memorable ones come from the same horse. 
A chunky draught that runs backwards when he gets nervous/excited. This resulted in many an abliterated post and rail in his attempt to leave the SJ arena. If I managed to get him moving forwards he also had a tendency to jump out of the arena if he so wished. Mortifying. And dangerous.


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## Carefreegirl (30 October 2013)

So many I couldn't list them all but on my previous horse I'd done quite a bit of Dressage but not much jumping. I took him to a SJ lesson the day before a Dressage competition and the next day trotted up the centre line and didn't turn at the end - he jumped over the boards ! I was gob smacked, judge was gob smacked, Boxer was proud as punch as he though he'd got a clear round :biggrin3: 

A couple of years ago on J was at Mk doing xc and she spooked at flowers on top of a corner fence and almost tipped me out the side. I'd just replaced the canister in my air vest and certainly wasn't going to pay another £17 out so soon. I managed to undo it but couldn't get the lanyard clip so called to the photographer to 'push me back on' After takIng about 100 photos he obliged. I got a round of applause :smile3: Luckily J just stood rock solid the whole time.


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## lucyebbs (2 November 2013)

on the way to a dressage comp we got stuck in traffic, so i had no warm up time.. just went straight into the test. 
this was the first time my little coloured had seen raised boards round the arena, we went down the centre line and turned left then jumped out the arena!! 
i just jumped back in and carried on with the test, and i also found out he'd never seen flowers around an arena before! 
then the little monkey wouldn't canter and on the judges comments, she wrote  'very own minded'!!!!


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## Arniebear (2 November 2013)

I managed to fall off when mounting, my foot was in the stirrup then i was on the floor!! And in the same day off a different horse i fell off dismounting :/ highly embarrassing it was in front of everyone and pony decided a lap of honor was needed... I left mum to catch him and headed back to the box to mount my next one!!


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## Mike007 (2 November 2013)

A dressage judge stopped my test today ,halfway through because she thought Bob the nota cob was becoming unsafe. In fairness and to be more accurate ,he was perfectly safe . Unfortunately nobody else within 50 yards of him was


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## AdorableAlice (2 November 2013)

Solihull Riding Club BD dressage outdoor arena, freezing December day and stupid here had clipped the 18h heavyweight hunter out the day before.  Bell goes, enter at A, squeal, squeal, honk, buck, swear, scream, squeal, thud directly onto X.  Judge said the horse kept straight throughout - there's a bonus then.

Very recently at Allens Hill in the school that is directly adjacent to the lorry park.  My lorry is parked facing the arena.  My horse being ridden by a friend, medium test in horizontal rain, hail and blowing a gale.  Unimpressed horse puts himself into rolkur and enters at A, halts at X, puts his head between his front legs and reverses, in a straight line back down the centre line out of the arena, does a turn on the haunches and continues reversing outside the arena down the longside, out of school and back to the lorry.  Rider hurls himself off and horse loads itself.


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## lucyebbs (2 November 2013)

AdorableAlice said:



			My horse being ridden by a friend, medium test in horizontal rain, hail and blowing a gale.  Unimpressed horse puts himself into rolkur and enters at A, halts at X, puts his head between his front legs and reverses, in a straight line back down the centre line out of the arena, does a turn on the haunches and continues reversing outside the arena down the longside, out of school and back to the lorry.  Rider hurls himself off and horse loads itself.
		
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Sorry, but I cant help but giggle at this!!


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## AdorableAlice (2 November 2013)

lucyebbs said:



			Sorry, but I cant help but giggle at this!!
		
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Along with a lot of other people ! the horse was 18 when he did that, very well known and a prolific winner, his last outing at that venue was a win on 79%.  He is 20 now, retired and at the first sign of rain goes and parks in his field shelter.  The precious boy simply does not do rain, end of.


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## Firewell (2 November 2013)

I have loads.
First jumping comp as a child my pony stopped and bucked me off at the first fence.  I had a proper tantrum lying on the ground and my dad had to come into the arena, pick me off up the floor and lock me in the car until I calmed down and then noone could catch my pony.

I once forgot the course in every class I had entered on two different horses who were jumping lovely. 

I have had to get off mid dressage test to throw up at the side of the arena (tummy bug).

I didn't even compete once when my old horse was such a horror in the warm up I just got off and went home.

With current boy we were on track to winning a SJ class untill I missed the last fence out and got eliminated.

We would have been placed BE if I had not crawled round the XC getting a million time faults because I had forgotten my glasses and couldn't see where the hell I was going.

Oh I have also turned up at a show just as they were packing everything away.

One show this year I missed two of my classes as was running so late.

All part of the fun I say .


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## Shutterbug (2 November 2013)

Oh this thread has had me in stitches 
I managed to go round an 18 jump XC course and only managed 5 of the jumps - he refused all the rest :O
I also fell off mid canter in a dressage test on a horse that wasnt mine - I still to this day have no idea why I fell off - I was cantering a 20m circle in the middle of the school and the next thing I was on the floor - horse did nothing to cause it, it was like I fell asleep in the saddle and just fell over


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## ClobellsandBaubles (2 November 2013)

A memorable one- I as only doing the 75cm novice class on a friends horse. We were doing a rather sticky round so say the least, got the striding wrong to an oxer which was the 2nd part of a double, next thing I know I am sitting on my bum facing the opposite direction still with both feet in the stirrups as the horse made for the collecting ring... made for a rather amusing image as I exited on foot carrying my stirrups


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## Festive_Felicitations (3 November 2013)

Not at a competition but my most embaressing moment of late - helping whip in  (hunting in Aus) I was leading the Huntman's horse nice controlled canter, came round the corner of the covert and the field were ahead, the ex-racehorse I was leading and my 'wanna be' ex-race horse decided that this was obviously a race
and took off. Unfortunately there was no way I was stopping 2 fit 16.2hh TBs, both in snaffles, and steering was disintergrating rapidly.

Called out 'Whip please' shortly followed by 'Look out! I'm not kidding! I have no brakes or steering!!!'  and went straight throught the centre of the field scattering them left and right and centre... whoops!

Half a field later and in front, both horses got a bit got bored or remembered their manners and I managed wrestle them back to a polite canter and we contiued round to the Huntsman. I did apologise to everyone later but I was seriously unimpressed with both horses. Both fine to be hunted in snaffles normally, but they were like a pair of naughty school boys egging each other on then having a ball of a time legging it up the field together, not really racing each other just having a good old Wheeeeeeeeeeeee! at my expense :-/


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## BBP (3 November 2013)

Took the then 27yr old welshie in a ridden veteran class at a decent show. Approximately 20 horses and ponies in the class, all going well, pony showing lovely flicky 'in a former top show pony' trot, call comes to canter on and the old dear decides to shove head between knees, porpoise around half the ring and then bog off once saddle suitably slipped. Cue mass stampede from 20 reprobate veterans. By the time the last one had been pulled up after several circuits of the ring, my little darling was standing angelically wondering what the fuss was for as I grovelled to the judge and tried to reset my saddle. Mortified. But hilarious to see so many oldies having fun!


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## SuperH (3 November 2013)

When I was about 13 I took my old pony showing, was happily walking around in the ring until we came alongside the spectators leaning over the ringside.  As we walk past my pony casually reaches over and takes a burger from one unlucky spectator and merrily continues walking around the ring chewing it.

Aged about 12 I fell off another pony 7 times at a hunter trial - in the warm up.  I should have quit then but was talked into giving the course a try.  Two refusals at fence one, got over third attempt.  Didn't like the look of fence two so trotted past it, gave fence three a try and cleared it, missed out fence four.  Had a stop at fence five.  Waited for the next competitor for a lead!  Then called it a day.  That was the first time pony club had made it compulsory to wear a body protector, I had a crescent shaped bruise on my bottom afterwards.

Wasn't a competition but I used to jump a hedge on our hack on a regular basis, one day cantered up to it, pony stopped and I did a lovely somersault over their head and got hooked with the hedge stuck under my body protector and unable to reach the ground facing the pony.  I had to take my body protector off to get free and drop down from the hedge.


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## Luci07 (4 November 2013)

OK, how about years ago, competing at Cranleigh show. Doing a wonderful if somewhat speedy SJ round. Had not put in studs (idiot), grass was watered and long.

Was eliminated as said horse fell over, slid under the rope around the ring (with me still on board). I was eliminated for "failing to leave the ring in the correct manner".. nuff said..


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## Mike007 (4 November 2013)

Thats a bit harsh !Edited to add that if it had been Bob the nota cob ,I could have understood ,as his fat Arse would have taken down all the ropes.(you can tell that he and I are not friends at the moment,since he got me thrown out half way through the dressage at Pacesham for being dangerous!!!!!on saturday)


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## Garnet (5 November 2013)

Final fence at Markyate horse trials 1992.  It had poured with rain all day, everyone was soaked and then I "missed" at the last fence.  Yes, I has been clear up until that point and yes, I fell off.  No, it didn't improve the day or the journey home - oooops!


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## chels (5 November 2013)

AdorableAlice said:



			Very recently at Allens Hill in the school that is directly adjacent to the lorry park.  My lorry is parked facing the arena.  My horse being ridden by a friend, medium test in horizontal rain, hail and blowing a gale.  Unimpressed horse puts himself into rolkur and enters at A, halts at X, puts his head between his front legs and reverses, in a straight line back down the centre line out of the arena, does a turn on the haunches and continues reversing outside the arena down the longside, out of school and back to the lorry.  Rider hurls himself off and horse loads itself.
		
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OMG can't stop laughing!


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## chels (5 November 2013)

I could write a book between my two big boys!
Jake the mad TB, far too much horse for 15yr old me but ever so pretty.
A small local PC dressage day; trotted in nice as pie, got to X, decided to salute the judge himself with both front legs. Spun in circles rearing and stag leaping in the middle of the arena. Couldn't get him to do anything in order to retire, leave or continue test. Wee rather elderly judge gets out of her car and calls me over, we get there eventually and she proceeds to ream me for throwing marks away by not using the corners of my arena. Thanks for the tip...
Our first horse trial, bucked me off twice at Jump 5 on the xc, then absolutely flew round the rest, through the finish flags, over the rope back onto the crossed, barrelled over a PN roll top backwards, two full wire fences, down the raceway and back to his trailer. Awfully pleased with himself was he.
And then, as a semi retired happy hacker at 24, went to do a 50cm HT for an outing. Halfway through dressage test, reared, bolted, jumped boards, bonnet of judge's car and arena fence and carted me off down the xc course. Took me half an hour to jog sideways back to the truck park.


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## tda (5 November 2013)

As a child I was also left on the ring ropes by a Shetland who went under!

Also BSPS winter champs M&M workers, ok I'd only qualified by default by the bloomin mare would not even jump the first fence.....3 refusals Arrrrrggghhh!!!!!


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## chels (5 November 2013)

And the white one...
First horse trial together, huge palisade, once we'd jumped it I had to stop and vomit.
Coming to a water jump, horse looking at the moving digger over the fence and paying no attention to me or where we were going, coming down to the log at A and galloped straight into it.
Was a very quiet xc horse when he first arrived, needed lots of encouragement. Third season in something clicked and he turned into demon horse to warm up, lined up everything in front of him, whether you were jumping it or not. Taupo HT he took on the intermediate warm up fence backwards, TD said he thought I'd probably warmed up enough (had only purposely jumped one fence!). Stormed round the course for his first clear.
Waeranga HT he thought he'd try going really really fast (in a snaffle). I had no brakes and was a little concerned. He got to the water two thirds the way round, leapt off the bank, stopped in the middle and wouldn't move. He felt he was done. Had to get off and lead him out and we set off on the walk of shame home.
Our final HT, jump two was a full height (105) ramp with pot plants in front (his nemesis) through a little gap between two other jumps. He came up the hill to it, backing off, backing off until we were pretty much walking and I thought he'd stopped so I'd let him look at it before I circled to represent. He got to the base, looked, decided it was fine and catapulted himself skyward with me clinging on for dear life. Jumped me up his neck and broke my arm in 5 places (but I never fell off!). I have RA and my wrists are fused, and while it hurt I thought I'd just banged it so carried on around the biggest trickiest course I've ever ridden which he did all himself while I tried to stay on top. jumped through the water at 14 and stopped in the paddock. I don't remember much from about jump 8. Had to be lifted off and ambulanced out :roll eyes:
Fast forward a couple of years, no more jumpies and I am a classified para rider. 
Winter dressage show. A jacket on the rail next to our arena blows in towards him as we are returning to the track at counter canter. Instead of running away from said jacket, he lunged TOWARDS it (predator instincts perhaps?) which resulted in him getting the pipe arena edging between his front legs. He then tried to spin, tripped himself up and nosedived into a puddle. Launched up, cantered off, so we counter cantered up the centre line and skidded to a halt somewhere in the region of G, absolutely sopping wet and filthy dirty.
Horse of the Year this year. He'd been really quiet all week since arrival (lulling me into a false sense of security I now know) and so we toddled over for our first test. In the field behind my arena was chickens and a chicken house (with fans on the wall) which was quite scary that day (although hadn't been the day before)  but we could cope. Just. Then the carriage horses started warming up. Yesterday they had only walked, not so today. Getting rather tense. Started test, going ok but feeling rather explosive. THEN the helicopter arrived. Cue rear, spin, bolt a couple of steps, sliding, QH type stop. Good emergency brakes that horse. Managed to turn back to judges car in order to retire, but then couldn't convince him to move in order to leave arena. Chickens ahead, carriages behind, one brain fried large white horse. Had to be rescued and lead out by my helper. Couldn't get him to stand long enough to untie me so I could get off so had to be lead back through the grounds to our stables, Ridge snorting and trumpeting the whole time. Yes folks, this is my para dressage horse.


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## Captain Bridget (5 November 2013)

There are some absolute classics in here!! Horses are funny creatures.

I only have a couple of moments as I've only just started competing really.

At Alresford Show (County level agricultural show), on Larry in the ROR Challenge class. Refused once at fence 1, once at fence 2, once at fence 3 and once at fence 5 then eliminated. We only made it over 4 out of 9 jumps. I was horribly embarrassed as he'd jumped everything in the warm up! But as it was a two phase class I went back in for the flat section and he was great, although due to our poor jumping performance we were last out of five. Still got a lovely rosette though!

At the same show riding a different horse. 16 year old cantankerous old git. Went into the ridden veteran class. He did the go around okay, a bit silly here and there. Then had to stand in the line up for the longest time as the class was so big. He got very bored and wouldn't stand still. When it was our turn for the individual show I could hardly get him going to start with, then he went lovely for half of it, and then he turned into a demon. Going any direction but forwards, threatening to rear, careering through the rest of the line up and scattering them across the ring and finally having to be removed from the ring by his owner while the judge wasn't looking! He'd come 3rd in the ROR challenge and qualified for Royal Windsor earlier in the day!


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## Mince Pie (5 November 2013)

Mike007 said:



			Thats a bit harsh !Edited to add that if it had been Bob the nota cob ,I could have understood ,as his fat Arse would have taken down all the ropes.(you can tell that he and I are not friends at the moment,since he got me thrown out half way through the dressage at Pacesham for being dangerous!!!!!on saturday)
		
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Oh Miiiike... I do think "that" photo needs to make a reappearance...


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## Jango (6 November 2013)

These are so funny!! My most embarrassing one was in a gymkhana race on a friends pony when I was a kid, you had to take a piece of toilet paper of the roll at one end and stab it onto a spike at the other (was a bit of an odd race!). I lunged for the bog roll but the piece didn't come off, the pony was spooked and we galloped out of the arena with a full toilet roll streaming behind us! I don't know why I didn't just let go!!


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## Optimissteeq (6 November 2013)

Rather amusing thread - horses are very leveling aren't they? - My contribution - I took my TB to an indoor dressage test (he'd been indoors before so no worries there), bell rang, we entered at A,  then horse spied himself in the mirror running the length of the long side. Being a sociable creature he whinnied a 'hello' and turned his head to see if horse would respond back - this prompted laughter from the people seated in the gallery behind him. Horse spins 180 to glare at crowd - eye's popping out 'where did they come from?' then moon walks back towards C - (judge was furiously ringing the bell at this point). we did complete the test but it was interspersed with whinnies to new found friend in the mirror and snorts at the people who had the gall to laugh at him (it wasn't a high scoring test)


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## MagicMelon (6 November 2013)

chels said:



			Third season in something clicked and he turned into demon horse to warm up, lined up everything in front of him, whether you were jumping it or not.
		
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Ha ha, this made me think of my grey as the opposite (pre his retirement  ).  Towards the end of his eventing career he got quite wound up about the XC warm up, especially at one venue in particular (Burgie), he would basically enter the XC warm up and I'd start trotting round then suddenly it would hit him he was about to go XC and that was so exciting he would just had to plant himself to the spot suddenly then do nothing but spin in circles! Couldn't get him to go forward or even stand still - he was just all over the place sideways and spinning!  At the last Burgie CIC* he did it really badly, I didn't even get to jump one warm up fence!!  He did this at quite a few events prior to this (he's just an anxious horse, he adores his XC) and I knew I could trust him with no warm up jumps as he was a XC machine.  He fairly shot out of the start box and always cruised round clear but hell not exactly a nice calm warm up!  Only once (at Burgie again actually!) did he suddenly do it in the middle of the XC course, after the 4th fence, he suddenly dived to the left and galloped sideways to a big pylon and then had a paddy where his legs were going everywhere but we weren't! Took about 20 seconds of me kicking him like mad yet trying to calm him down, when suddenly the handbrake came off and off we went again (were clear but had time faults obviously). Funny thing was he never ever did stuff like this day to day or when showjumping etc.  He was extremely well behaved, the XC was just too exciting.


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## anna22 (6 November 2013)

Getting 40% in an intro Forgetting a test half way round Not even getting over fence one, horse decided marquees were terrifying this day so stood on his back legs and refused to go anywhere Jumping the dressage boards 3 times in one test Going over a jump minus pony and ended up hanging in the middle of the spread, fence still intact?!  
And a non-competing one, but out hunting my 17.2 grey beast decided dubbing was so boring, he would lie down in the middle of the meet with me on his back  mortified master asked if it was our party trick
Happens to everyone, yours certainly isn't the first, nor the last time you'll make a hash of something!


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## JustMeThen (17 November 2013)

Fools Motto said:



			So many! Pretty much all the above has happened to me in one way or another!!

But, I do remember being at Stonar Schools ODE, and in the pouring rain, on a very non dressage pony, trying to do dressage. All was going well, as well as expected, down the centre line, stop, salute, continue, C track right... BEEEP. So I stopped. Sure I knew I was right. After an age of me standing there in shock, the judge finally got out and asked what was wrong! I then said I had gone wrong as I got beeped, with a no you didn't, yes you did panto style argument!  Only after that, did I realise it was the arena next to me that beeped. For my error, (and argument) I got something like 80penalities, = true shocker!  
Never mind, I'm on a jumping machine, make up some places in the next phases. For the first time ever (and only time), pony had other ideas, and by fence 3 SJ I was elim. Well, should have stayed in bed that day!!
		
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I was jumping once when the judges beeped me... I pulled up and asked what it was and they said I'd jumped the wrong course. I was sure I hadn't and we argued for a bit but it was only when my friend pointed out  I'd knocked down the fence they said I hadn't jumped that they admitted defeat 

The other week, I was jumping a single phase course and got so carried away because the boy was jumping so well and I was enjoying it so much, I forgot the last fence.

To top it though, I jumped at the Area 46 show one year and jumping just after me was William Funnell. Obviously it was the biggest thing I'd ever done and a nothing for him... we were warming up at the same time and his groom was about to put the oxer up when I asked if I could jump it first. Cue WF, groom and others all standing back, watching me - and I got it completely wrong, buried my poor horse and sent all four wings and three poles flying. Oops.


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## JustMeThen (17 November 2013)

Optimissteeq said:



			Rather amusing thread - horses are very leveling aren't they? - My contribution - I took my TB to an indoor dressage test (he'd been indoors before so no worries there), bell rang, we entered at A,  then horse spied himself in the mirror running the length of the long side. Being a sociable creature he whinnied a 'hello' and turned his head to see if horse would respond back - this prompted laughter from the people seated in the gallery behind him. Horse spins 180 to glare at crowd - eye's popping out 'where did they come from?' then moon walks back towards C - (judge was furiously ringing the bell at this point). we did complete the test but it was interspersed with whinnies to new found friend in the mirror and snorts at the people who had the gall to laugh at him (it wasn't a high scoring test)
		
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Brilliant


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## Auslander (18 November 2013)

Many many years ago. PC dressage on a rather opinionated little horse, who thought dressage was merely an interruption before the proper stuff. First test was ok, but when we tacked him up for the second test, he thought we were jumping, and got completely above himself. We trotted down the centre line, he said "Hang on a minute - MORE dressage? Dream on", then span, dropped his shoulder, decanted me, and cleared off out of the arena. Unfortunately, there were 4 other arenas between us and wherever he thought he'd rather be. He charged straight through the lot, bucking and squealing as he went, and was collared by the DC at the other end. I had to do the walk of shame past several furious PC mothers,and then collect him from the DC, who, to give her credit, was highly amused!

"I don't think you're going to make teams this year Dear" she said


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## PaddyMonty (18 November 2013)

Eliminated at fence 3 in SJ phase at BE90.  Nothing very unusual about that you say except horse was my own grade B showjumper!


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## Tonks (20 November 2013)

BE event.......too concerned about making up time xc.....kicked on.....only to wonder where all the fences had gone? 

I'd gone the wrong way, following a different roped off section that didn't have ANY fences in it at all. 

Had to bloomin turn around gallop back to original fence [I got lost at] and follow the correct roped off area to the fences.......looked like I was out for a sunday stroll with my horse.

incurred about a zillion time penalites.


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