# Cat experts - advice on two cats who don't get on



## soloequestrian (19 June 2017)

Cat 1: small black female rescue cat - had been locked in a house with no food and very little human contact before rescue.  Have had her 2 years, now in great condition, loves being outdoors, affectionate and playful but not a lap cat.  She is still wary of humans she doesn't know.
Cat 2: Bengal male rescue cat - was found, adopted by multi-cat household, got bullied, escaped, lived as stray, lost half bodyweight, eventually caught by rescue centre.  He should have gone to a home on his own but I was allowed him because my other cat is very timid and he had been bullied.  He was terrified of people when he arrived, now very affectionate and wants cuddles all the time.  He is scared of strangers and nervous of us when we stand up, though this is getting better.  Have had him for 3 months.
Initially, I swapped smells, Feliway friends was plugged in and then I moved on to letting them see each other either side of a wire mesh.  He was friendly, she was nervous but stayed to look at him.  As he got more access to the house, I kept them separated by mesh so she could come and go.  He got to a point where he looked like he wanted to chase her so I decided to separate them until he had access to outdoors and could get rid of energy.  
In hindsight, this was a bad plan - he now thinks that one end of the house is his territory and a few weeks ago when she ventured through his open cat flap, he attacked her.  Fur flew but there were no injuries.  When outside, he initially seemed friendly to her but she ran from him and he chased her (though not with huge intent), and since then I've seen him chase her (again, fairly half-heartedly) outside.
At the moment, he is shut in a room at night and she has the run of the house - she spends the night on our bed.  In the day, he can access half the house and outdoors - he doesn't know how cat flaps work yet, so she has the other half of the house that is safe from him, and access to the outdoors.  I am getting her used to a microchip cat flap so I can give her an even safer area.
I would love to find a way to help them get on with each other.  I really don't want to rehome either of them - they've both had horrible experiences and even though the female is nervous of the male, she is pretty chilled and happy most of the time.  She does seem to have reduced her time spent outdoors but I hope they might evolve some sort of time-share agreement.  It's more in the house that is the problem - I have to keep the two ends separate at the moment which isn't great for any of us.
I wondered if anyone has experience of this type of situation and could make suggestions about how to improve it?


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## JillA (19 June 2017)

Might be worth you getting a cat behaviourist to come up with a plan. There are a fair few in the APBC, (I tried to get their list of members for you but my system went on  go slow - Google it)


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## ycbm (19 June 2017)

I would seriously encourage you to let the Bengal go to a one cat home.

I had a half Bengal who used to hate females, to the point of having to be stopped from killing our first female kitten.

When she was killed on the road, we were much more careful of our next kitten introduction, and everything seemed really good. 

Then we suddenly lost the Bengal to heart failure, when the other two were three years old. The difference in the characters of two cats we thought were fully developed and set behaviourally has been nothing short of astonishing. And actually also very saddening. It's clear that for three years they lived in fear, totally suppressed by the presence of the older cat. They looked fine, they weren't fine.


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## soloequestrian (19 June 2017)

Thanks both.  If I do rehome one, it will probably be the female.  I took her on in desperation after losing my previous cat - the house was filling up with mice at an alarming rate and I couldn't find a cat I liked.  She was proving difficult to rehome (non-descript black and terrified of people) so I took her on and she has done a great job with the rodent control but I have never felt the kind of bond with her as I've had with the others, and now have with the Bengal.  
I had a look at the APBC website and there was a nice article on providing separate territories within an area - that's what I'm aiming for, hoping the female gets the hang of her new microchip door soon.  She has been faffing with it, so it opens a little and closes again and then when she tries to push it properly it's in its 'lock' time.  I'll leave it jammed open for a while....
She was just round at the stables with me a few minutes ago looking relaxed and she has had a period in the past where she refused to go out (before I got this cat - still don't know what happened to her) so I know she's not overly traumatised right now.


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## Equi (19 June 2017)

As soon as i read bengal, i stopped reading. Unfortunately they are notoriously aggressive with other cats


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## Casey76 (21 June 2017)

Some cats just don't get on, no matter what you do.

I have a brother and sister who have been with me since they were about 5 weeks old (long story), they are now almost 10, and the brother is forever menacing the sister, and will often jump on her and giver her a good bat.  Yet he tolerates all of my other cats (also a long story) with just a little disdain.


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## MagicMelon (25 June 2017)

equi said:



			As soon as i read bengal, i stopped reading. Unfortunately they are notoriously aggressive with other cats 

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Like with any cat though, totally depends. I wouldnt say as a breed they're worse than any other. I have 2 female Bengals, my two get on fine. One of them will occasionally chase the other one around for 30 seconds but its not nasty at all she does it for fun, no fur flying or anything like that, the cat who gets jumped on then goes for the dog usually straight after - I think its a bit of a hierarchy thing! Most of the time they end up sleeping right on top of one another (usually grumbling at each other yet they still choose to do it - bizarre). Ive seen some serious fights between regular non-pedigree cats. Im unsure if Id necessarily mix a Bengal with a non Bengal though as they are very different. I had always had regular cats up until my two and they are different, they're more like dogs, so maybe they clash purely on that level?  Although being half bengal you wouldnt think the difference would be as strong. Id probably rehome the female if it really seems clear they're not happy together, sad to do but its a shame if they simply dont like each other.


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## Honey08 (26 June 2017)

IT seems a shame that your existing, settled cat that is nervous would be the one you'd rehome.  Why her?


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## ester (26 June 2017)

Honey08 said:



			IT seems a shame that your existing, settled cat that is nervous would be the one you'd rehome.  Why her?
		
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Especially as presumably the other one would be able to be returned to the rescue he has just come from and likely more desirable, I didn't get that either TBF.


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## MotherOfChickens (26 June 2017)

soloequestrian said:



			Thanks both.  If I do rehome one, it will probably be the female.  I took her on in desperation after losing my previous cat - the house was filling up with mice at an alarming rate and I couldn't find a cat I liked.  She was proving difficult to rehome (non-descript black and terrified of people) so I took her on and she has done a great job with the rodent control but I have never felt the kind of bond with her as I've had with the others, and now have with the Bengal.  
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this is a shame-black cats are hard to rehome and now she'll be older and harder still to rehome. she's a good mouser, I'd keep her! there's enough people wanting the more exotic Bengals for some reason. 


I've never had a problem with integrating tom cats-even older toms with tom kittens and I've done it several times-they always end up as good mates. females are trickier so I'm told.


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## Sussexbythesea (26 June 2017)

I think it's really sad that you'd rehome your original cat rather than the new one. Poor thing.


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## Emma_H (27 June 2017)

Sussexbythesea said:



			I think it's really sad that you'd rehome your original cat rather than the new one. Poor thing.
		
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I find it terribly sad too, in fact no, it makes me quite cross to be honest. The cat that has been with you for 2 years is going to be wrenched away from what she knows and find herself in a rescue centre. 
Why wouldn't you rehome the Bengal instead? He is more likely to find a home quicker.


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