# Feeling 😪



## Sk2016 (4 March 2020)

Hi guys,

I need some input from fellow horse lovers! 

As you all know winter is long,wet and miserable so it’s hard on us horsey peeps so we are all feeling pretty low at mo...

So, I own 5 horses and right now feeling very deflated as all are projects basically!

I have one mare who’s a companion 

Second is another mare who is gorgeous, stubborn very forward going but over all easy to do, hacks out alone and in company but is quite green and can be unpredictable at times and can “take off” with you if something triggers her so puts you on edge as you don’t quite know what’s going to happen next. It’s not a full on bolt you can control her but you need to have your guard about you and be ready to basically take hold of the situation.

3rd I have a 17hh Tb older gent  total gem to do in all ways,hack in company a total novice could hack him out on the buckle end no stirrups etc a real plod for a Tb , alone tho he naps (walks backwards) I’ve over come this issue twice with him over the years and have had lovely hacks together but over the last year or so he’s lost confidence and now refuses to even make it half way down the lane by himself to the point he backs into hedges , spins etc which he did a spin the other day which chucked me out of the saddle onto the floor infront a lady driving past ... I was fine luckily and he ran off upto the stables and left me walking back horseless! 

4th I have my youngest he’s a very big lad really stocky very strong and only 5 so has some growing still to do, he has a lot to potential he’s such a gorgeous horse. I backed him myself slowly so he’s had spells of short riding,hacking ,turned away etc so now it’s time for him to come back into work so he’s going to be very green and need time putting into him. My plan is to send him away for a few weeks professional training within the next couple of months as well as me working getting him going again.

Lastly is my newest boy I’ve had since Oct .. he’s 17.2/3 hh Tb. Typical tb, joggy to hack out which is fine as new this when I went to view/test him. I had some naughty behaviour within the first month or 2 testing behaviour basically which resulted in me coming off him. lately due to weather they have been stabled at night,out in day for several hours unless horrendous weather, the odd night out if not to bad. But he’s started being a pain in the butt even more so when hacking bronking ,nappy,kicking back legs out, grunting checking head down up etc you can sit it but when he’s really annoyed with you it turns out dangerous where he gets so close to cars even parked cars it gets to the point where I have to get off and walk home!

At the start of the hacks he’s fine it’s just when he doesn’t get his own way eg - he likes the reins so you give him more reins then wants to trot/canter up the road 🤯 so the only way to control him is slightly more contact with the reins then he gets the hump after awhile. 🙄 
(It’s not pain related all checks have been carried out). So I’m thinking it’s lack of turnout, Haylage / build up of energy?! 
I have a young girl who is coming out a couple of times pw to hack him out as well so he’s getting more exercise and he’s better behaved for her even though he still is naughty she sits it, kicks him on and he soon snaps out of it. With me , he’s not happy until I’m walking home 🤦‍♀️

So you can see why I’m feeling down at the moment as I just want to hack out safely and enjoy them , I have my own yard so by myself so it’s important I’m safe when riding out. I spend so much money time and effort on them I just need to have some enjoyment instead of all the hard work all the time.

 I’ve had people suggesting I sell one to buy a safer horse to enjoy while working with the “monkeys”! 
But I love them all dearly and every week I keep hoping the time and effort I’m putting in with them will pay off and I’ll be able to enjoy hacks out without ending up on the floor,in ditches and almost hitting cars but I’m losing so much time and worried I’ll miss out on another summer or even worse in hospital! 

I’m pulling my hair out on what to do guys 😪😭 
So do I just keep going and see what summer brings and get my youngster going and try keeping going with my others?
Or 
Sell one and buy a more suitable hacker 😭 

What would you do in my situation?
Ideally I’d buy number 6 but I think my partner would leave me 🤣 

Sorry for the huge essay 🤦‍♀️ Xx


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## Bellaboo18 (4 March 2020)

Honestly, I'd want to sell them all and get one suitable horse. 
Where did you get the latest addition from? If a private owner would they be interested in having him back at a reduced price? If a dealer they may be willing to do sales livery. 
I'd pick the easiest to re-home start with that one and then work your way through them. 
If the youngster is going to be sent away anyway I'd send him away with the view to sell. 

Definitely don't get a 6th.


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## Leo Walker (4 March 2020)

I'm another that would sell them all,or all with the exception of the companion and the youngster. Use the money to have the youngster educated and on going support when hes back home. I'd be leaning towards them all going and getting one that's right though. Youngsters are hard work! 

You might love them but they aren't suitable for what you want, and they will be suitable for someone else. That many horses and not one you enjoy riding is crazy. And I know, I've been there.

You will be so much happier with one horse to focus on, one that you enjoy riding.


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## Baywonder (4 March 2020)

I agree with @Bellaboo18 and @Leo Walker .  

You have far too many horses, and as there is only you, it will be impossible to give each of them enough time to bring them on and iron out their little quirks and niggles.  Already, your newest horse knows how to get you off and walk it back, which is not good for you or the horse. Also, the fact you don't have any support being on your own yard only makes the situation more difficult.

Have a serious think about your numbers and consider selling some of them. Buying a 6th would only add to the problems, so please don't do it.  Cut down on your numbers for the sake of the horses, your sanity, safety and bank balance.   I haven't had a horse for a good many years now, but I only had one, and that was hard work!


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## dorsetladette (4 March 2020)

I'd be looking to down size too. 

Does the young girl you have hacking for you want to buy the latest addition? if she is getting on with him better than you? payment plan or even loan from your yard?

What is your plan for the youngster when he is up and running? are you planning on competing or will he be a happy hacker? if the later I'd consider selling him while he is away with professional and using that money to get something more suited. 

The old gent that does't like hacking alone - can you ride out with the young girl on the newbie? 

The spooky mare - is she talented at anything else apart from hacking? would she make a nice riding club horse or SJ mare given some schooling? maybe once the youngster is either back or sold you could send her off for some schooling/possibly sales livery?

I definitely think reducing numbers is the way forward. At some points over winter I've felt like 2 is to much for me I can't imagine 5 or 6 on my own.


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## Sk2016 (4 March 2020)

Thanks for the input guys I do appreciate it but not quite what I had in mind as now it’s made me feel even worse. 

It’s not a option to get rid of them all I wouldn’t dream of it. 

I think I will get a trainer out and help with some of the issues and go from there. 
I took on these animals to give them a good home they are very well looked after and couldn’t want for anything it just happens so I have a big heart and possibly sucker written on my forehead... I’m not the first nor the last to be in this situation I’m pretty experienced and haven’t of yet ended up with broken bones or a kick in all my years of owning horses ... not even a vet bill so I must be doing something right! 

Again thanks for the suggested input but I don’t want to be feeling shitter than I already do 😭


Sk2016 said:



			Hi guys,

I need some input from fellow horse lovers!

As you all know winter is long,wet and miserable so it’s hard on us horsey peeps so we are all feeling pretty low at mo...

So, I own 5 horses and right now feeling very deflated as all are projects basically!

I have one mare who’s a companion

Second is another mare who is gorgeous, stubborn very forward going but over all easy to do, hacks out alone and in company but is quite green and can be unpredictable at times and can “take off” with you if something triggers her so puts you on edge as you don’t quite know what’s going to happen next. It’s not a full on bolt you can control her but you need to have your guard about you and be ready to basically take hold of the situation.

3rd I have a 17hh Tb older gent  total gem to do in all ways,hack in company a total novice could hack him out on the buckle end no stirrups etc a real plod for a Tb , alone tho he naps (walks backwards) I’ve over come this issue twice with him over the years and have had lovely hacks together but over the last year or so he’s lost confidence and now refuses to even make it half way down the lane by himself to the point he backs into hedges , spins etc which he did a spin the other day which chucked me out of the saddle onto the floor infront a lady driving past ... I was fine luckily and he ran off upto the stables and left me walking back horseless!

4th I have my youngest he’s a very big lad really stocky very strong and only 5 so has some growing still to do, he has a lot to potential he’s such a gorgeous horse. I backed him myself slowly so he’s had spells of short riding,hacking ,turned away etc so now it’s time for him to come back into work so he’s going to be very green and need time putting into him. My plan is to send him away for a few weeks professional training within the next couple of months as well as me working getting him going again.

Lastly is my newest boy I’ve had since Oct .. he’s 17.2/3 hh Tb. Typical tb, joggy to hack out which is fine as new this when I went to view/test him. I had some naughty behaviour within the first month or 2 testing behaviour basically which resulted in me coming off him. lately due to weather they have been stabled at night,out in day for several hours unless horrendous weather, the odd night out if not to bad. But he’s started being a pain in the butt even more so when hacking bronking ,nappy,kicking back legs out, grunting checking head down up etc you can sit it but when he’s really annoyed with you it turns out dangerous where he gets so close to cars even parked cars it gets to the point where I have to get off and walk home!

At the start of the hacks he’s fine it’s just when he doesn’t get his own way eg - he likes the reins so you give him more reins then wants to trot/canter up the road 🤯 so the only way to control him is slightly more contact with the reins then he gets the hump after awhile. 🙄
(It’s not pain related all checks have been carried out). So I’m thinking it’s lack of turnout, Haylage / build up of energy?!
I have a young girl who is coming out a couple of times pw to hack him out as well so he’s getting more exercise and he’s better behaved for her even though he still is naughty she sits it, kicks him on and he soon snaps out of it. With me , he’s not happy until I’m walking home 🤦‍♀️

So you can see why I’m feeling down at the moment as I just want to hack out safely and enjoy them , I have my own yard so by myself so it’s important I’m safe when riding out. I spend so much money time and effort on them I just need to have some enjoyment instead of all the hard work all the time.

I’ve had people suggesting I sell one to buy a safer horse to enjoy while working with the “monkeys”!
But I love them all dearly and every week I keep hoping the time and effort I’m putting in with them will pay off and I’ll be able to enjoy hacks out without ending up on the floor,in ditches and almost hitting cars but I’m losing so much time and worried I’ll miss out on another summer or even worse in hospital!

I’m pulling my hair out on what to do guys 😪😭
So do I just keep going and see what summer brings and get my youngster going and try keeping going with my others?
Or
Sell one and buy a more suitable hacker 😭

What would you do in my situation?
Ideally I’d buy number 6 but I think my partner would leave me 🤣

Sorry for the huge essay 🤦‍♀️ Xx
		
Click to expand...


Thanks for the input guys I do appreciate it but not quite what I had in mind as now it’s made me feel even worse. 

It’s not a option to get rid of them all I wouldn’t dream of it. 

I think I will get a trainer out and help with some of the issues and go from there. 
I took on these animals to give them a good home they are very well looked after and couldn’t want for anything it just happens so I have a big heart and possibly sucker written on my forehead... I’m not the first nor the last to be in this situation I’m pretty experienced and haven’t of yet ended up with broken bones or a kick in all my years of owning horses ... not even a vet bill so I must be doing something right! 

Again thanks for the suggested input but I don’t want to be feeling shitter than I already do 😭


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## be positive (4 March 2020)

Sk2016 said:



			Thanks for the input guys I do appreciate it but not quite what I had in mind as now it’s made me feel even worse.


It’s not a option to get rid of them all I wouldn’t dream of it.

I think I will get a trainer out and help with some of the issues and go from there.
I took on these animals to give them a good home they are very well looked after and couldn’t want for anything it just happens so I have a big heart and possibly sucker written on my forehead... I’m not the first nor the last to be in this situation I’m pretty experienced and haven’t of yet ended up with broken bones or a kick in all my years of owning horses ... not even a vet bill so I must be doing something right!

Again thanks for the suggested input but I don’t want to be feeling shitter than I already do 😭
		
Click to expand...


I don't think anyone wanted to make you feel worse or imply you are not taking good care of them but you do seem to be collecting horses that are maybe less than ideal for the purpose of being a nice hack to enjoy and getting another before you have managed to sort out the ones you already have, they may be 'monkeys' to you but they sound as if they are probably not getting enough work or maybe the wrong type of work to improve without some professional help which may include getting a vet involved to rule out physical reasons for them having issues.

Having a trainer involved who may be able to take a look at them all and help you plan the next 6 months with a list of priorities could be really useful, you could sit down yourself and start the list, have a realistic aim for each horse and break it down to steps that are sensible, that can be fitted in and will allow you to be focused  on where you want to be by the end of the summer.

You have 4 horses none of which are straightforward, ok the youngest may be but if you lack time he could end up not being as easy as you hope , the latest addition sounds as if it may well give you your first vet bill as he sounds like a horse with physical issues and I would want him checked over properly before saying it is just bad behaviour and not pain related, guessing the checks have not been by a vet as you say you have never had a vet bill or if the vet did check it was just a quick once over not a proper workup. 

Horse no 3 that no longer hacks alone may also be worth checking as loss of confidence often goes hand in hand with pain or discomfort somewhere, they often go along with the flow hacking in company but do not cope when the pressure of being alone becomes too much.


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## Auslander (4 March 2020)

I'm not sure what you want people to say - nobody has been nasty, but you're now feeling worse? 
The way I see it, you have a lot of horses, none of which you are particularly enjoying. I'm sure they do have a lovely home, and are really well looked after, but they could be just as well loved and looked after in a different home, doing something different that might be more suitable for them. I know we all think that no-one can possibly provide a better home than we can, but that's really not the case.
You could have a lovely horse which really enjoys doing what you like doing, and your square pegs could find lovely square holes, where they will be happy and loved. It' worth thinking about surely - without letting emotion cloud your judgement


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## fankino04 (4 March 2020)

I get where you are coming from op as I was too much of a softie to sell mine so she is now an expensive field ornament. I would ask if all 4 rideable ones were "fixed" tomorrow what would you do with them? Do you have time to ride all of them? Do you want to make time for 4 ridden horses plus a retiree? If in an ideal world you only want one happy hacker then I would work through getting them all checked by a vet and assessed by a trainer to plan getting them ready to be loaned out (send away for schooling livery?)so you know that you are still their safety net but you are free to either loan the right horse for yourself or if one of yours comes good devote your time to your partnership with that one and enjoy being a horse owner again.


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## meleeka (4 March 2020)

fankino04 said:



			I get where you are coming from op as I was too much of a softie to sell mine so she is now an expensive field ornament. I would ask if all 4 rideable ones were "fixed" tomorrow what would you do with them? Do you have time to ride all of them? Do you want to make time for 4 ridden horses plus a retiree? If in an ideal world you only want one happy hacker then I would work through getting them all checked by a vet and assessed by a trainer to plan getting them ready to be loaned out (send away for schooling livery?)so you know that you are still their safety net but you are free to either loan the right horse for yourself or if one of yours comes good devote your time to your partnership with that one and enjoy being a horse owner again.
		
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I have 5 but 3 of them are field ornaments and small ones at that.  I can’t imagine having them all in work and doing all the jobs that need doing too, I really wouldn’t have the time or the energy.


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## Bellaboo18 (4 March 2020)

Don't make the mistake of thinking you're the only one that can offer them a good home. There are lots of lovely homes out there and no rider suits every horse.


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## Pinkvboots (4 March 2020)

I think I would keep number 4 and sell or re home the rest. But just seen you don't want to part with them so could you get some help to get them going a bit better then get some sharers for them or part loan?


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## dorsetladette (5 March 2020)

Where about's in the south west are you OP? maybe some of us could recommend some good trainers we've had good results from/with?

Do you have a school or somewhere enclosed at the yard you can ride safely in?


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## milliepops (5 March 2020)

meleeka said:



			I have 5 but 3 of them are field ornaments and small ones at that.  I can’t imagine having them all in work and doing all the jobs that need doing too, I really wouldn’t have the time or the energy.
		
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Same!  I can keep 2 going but I would need help every day to keep a third in work 

I agree with the posters above, they sound like the wrong horses for your situation and needs, and therefore selling or loaning would seem to make sense. If you get a trainer to come and help you, are you going to be able to get them frequently enough to make a difference?  I'd be inclined to focus on the young horse and one other and either turn away or sell/loan the others, because it sounds like consistent work and plenty of time is what is needed for all of them and that would be more achievable with only a couple of horses to keep on top of.


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## Equi-Living (17 March 2020)

Sk2016 said:



			Hi guys,

I need some input from fellow horse lovers!

As you all know winter is long,wet and miserable so it’s hard on us horsey peeps so we are all feeling pretty low at mo...

So, I own 5 horses and right now feeling very deflated as all are projects basically!

I have one mare who’s a companion

Second is another mare who is gorgeous, stubborn very forward going but over all easy to do, hacks out alone and in company but is quite green and can be unpredictable at times and can “take off” with you if something triggers her so puts you on edge as you don’t quite know what’s going to happen next. It’s not a full on bolt you can control her but you need to have your guard about you and be ready to basically take hold of the situation.

3rd I have a 17hh Tb older gent  total gem to do in all ways,hack in company a total novice could hack him out on the buckle end no stirrups etc a real plod for a Tb , alone tho he naps (walks backwards) I’ve over come this issue twice with him over the years and have had lovely hacks together but over the last year or so he’s lost confidence and now refuses to even make it half way down the lane by himself to the point he backs into hedges , spins etc which he did a spin the other day which chucked me out of the saddle onto the floor infront a lady driving past ... I was fine luckily and he ran off upto the stables and left me walking back horseless!

4th I have my youngest he’s a very big lad really stocky very strong and only 5 so has some growing still to do, he has a lot to potential he’s such a gorgeous horse. I backed him myself slowly so he’s had spells of short riding,hacking ,turned away etc so now it’s time for him to come back into work so he’s going to be very green and need time putting into him. My plan is to send him away for a few weeks professional training within the next couple of months as well as me working getting him going again.

Lastly is my newest boy I’ve had since Oct .. he’s 17.2/3 hh Tb. Typical tb, joggy to hack out which is fine as new this when I went to view/test him. I had some naughty behaviour within the first month or 2 testing behaviour basically which resulted in me coming off him. lately due to weather they have been stabled at night,out in day for several hours unless horrendous weather, the odd night out if not to bad. But he’s started being a pain in the butt even more so when hacking bronking ,nappy,kicking back legs out, grunting checking head down up etc you can sit it but when he’s really annoyed with you it turns out dangerous where he gets so close to cars even parked cars it gets to the point where I have to get off and walk home!

At the start of the hacks he’s fine it’s just when he doesn’t get his own way eg - he likes the reins so you give him more reins then wants to trot/canter up the road 🤯 so the only way to control him is slightly more contact with the reins then he gets the hump after awhile. 🙄
(It’s not pain related all checks have been carried out). So I’m thinking it’s lack of turnout, Haylage / build up of energy?!
I have a young girl who is coming out a couple of times pw to hack him out as well so he’s getting more exercise and he’s better behaved for her even though he still is naughty she sits it, kicks him on and he soon snaps out of it. With me , he’s not happy until I’m walking home 🤦‍♀️

So you can see why I’m feeling down at the moment as I just want to hack out safely and enjoy them , I have my own yard so by myself so it’s important I’m safe when riding out. I spend so much money time and effort on them I just need to have some enjoyment instead of all the hard work all the time.

I’ve had people suggesting I sell one to buy a safer horse to enjoy while working with the “monkeys”!
But I love them all dearly and every week I keep hoping the time and effort I’m putting in with them will pay off and I’ll be able to enjoy hacks out without ending up on the floor,in ditches and almost hitting cars but I’m losing so much time and worried I’ll miss out on another summer or even worse in hospital!

I’m pulling my hair out on what to do guys 😪😭
So do I just keep going and see what summer brings and get my youngster going and try keeping going with my others?
Or
Sell one and buy a more suitable hacker 😭

What would you do in my situation?
Ideally I’d buy number 6 but I think my partner would leave me 🤣

Sorry for the huge essay 🤦‍♀️ Xx
		
Click to expand...

hi


Sk2016 said:



			Hi guys,

I need some input from fellow horse lovers!

As you all know winter is long,wet and miserable so it’s hard on us horsey peeps so we are all feeling pretty low at mo...

So, I own 5 horses and right now feeling very deflated as all are projects basically!

I have one mare who’s a companion

Second is another mare who is gorgeous, stubborn very forward going but over all easy to do, hacks out alone and in company but is quite green and can be unpredictable at times and can “take off” with you if something triggers her so puts you on edge as you don’t quite know what’s going to happen next. It’s not a full on bolt you can control her but you need to have your guard about you and be ready to basically take hold of the situation.

3rd I have a 17hh Tb older gent  total gem to do in all ways,hack in company a total novice could hack him out on the buckle end no stirrups etc a real plod for a Tb , alone tho he naps (walks backwards) I’ve over come this issue twice with him over the years and have had lovely hacks together but over the last year or so he’s lost confidence and now refuses to even make it half way down the lane by himself to the point he backs into hedges , spins etc which he did a spin the other day which chucked me out of the saddle onto the floor infront a lady driving past ... I was fine luckily and he ran off upto the stables and left me walking back horseless!

4th I have my youngest he’s a very big lad really stocky very strong and only 5 so has some growing still to do, he has a lot to potential he’s such a gorgeous horse. I backed him myself slowly so he’s had spells of short riding,hacking ,turned away etc so now it’s time for him to come back into work so he’s going to be very green and need time putting into him. My plan is to send him away for a few weeks professional training within the next couple of months as well as me working getting him going again.

Lastly is my newest boy I’ve had since Oct .. he’s 17.2/3 hh Tb. Typical tb, joggy to hack out which is fine as new this when I went to view/test him. I had some naughty behaviour within the first month or 2 testing behaviour basically which resulted in me coming off him. lately due to weather they have been stabled at night,out in day for several hours unless horrendous weather, the odd night out if not to bad. But he’s started being a pain in the butt even more so when hacking bronking ,nappy,kicking back legs out, grunting checking head down up etc you can sit it but when he’s really annoyed with you it turns out dangerous where he gets so close to cars even parked cars it gets to the point where I have to get off and walk home!

At the start of the hacks he’s fine it’s just when he doesn’t get his own way eg - he likes the reins so you give him more reins then wants to trot/canter up the road 🤯 so the only way to control him is slightly more contact with the reins then he gets the hump after awhile. 🙄
(It’s not pain related all checks have been carried out). So I’m thinking it’s lack of turnout, Haylage / build up of energy?!
I have a young girl who is coming out a couple of times pw to hack him out as well so he’s getting more exercise and he’s better behaved for her even though he still is naughty she sits it, kicks him on and he soon snaps out of it. With me , he’s not happy until I’m walking home 🤦‍♀️

So you can see why I’m feeling down at the moment as I just want to hack out safely and enjoy them , I have my own yard so by myself so it’s important I’m safe when riding out. I spend so much money time and effort on them I just need to have some enjoyment instead of all the hard work all the time.

I’ve had people suggesting I sell one to buy a safer horse to enjoy while working with the “monkeys”!
But I love them all dearly and every week I keep hoping the time and effort I’m putting in with them will pay off and I’ll be able to enjoy hacks out without ending up on the floor,in ditches and almost hitting cars but I’m losing so much time and worried I’ll miss out on another summer or even worse in hospital!

I’m pulling my hair out on what to do guys 😪😭
So do I just keep going and see what summer brings and get my youngster going and try keeping going with my others?
Or
Sell one and buy a more suitable hacker 😭

What would you do in my situation?
Ideally I’d buy number 6 but I think my partner would leave me 🤣

Sorry for the huge essay 🤦‍♀️ Xx
		
Click to expand...


Hi, I would not sell any either lol!

However, I would choose just 1 horse to work with for say a period of 3 months, work out the programme you are going to follow and why you are following it - so what is your goal with that one particular horse and stay with it, the others can just be horses for a while which is what they enjoy most of all, they are not actually meant to be ridden.

The youngster needs daily handling so all the usual stuff, feet picking, ground skills but very basic, building the relationship and trust is the most important.

If you have a really difficult horse which behaves itself with the others when you are not trying to work it, leave that one and go for the most needy, the one that perhaps is not mixing too well or has some real problems.

You can work generally, daily, with all of them just from the ground.

If you need any further help just ask   Good luck it is hard when the wea


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## SpringArising (17 March 2020)

I think you need to make sure the next horse you buy is more suited to you. You've come off twice in a relatively short time frame from two different horses. You're also on your own and have a whole herd to think about should something happen to you. 

FWIW, just because you haven't had a vet bill or a broken bone it doesn't mean you're doing the right things - there are people who are shitty owners who luck out and people who do everything in their power who have problem after problem through no fault of their own. 

If I were you I'd put down the companion and the nappy old TB and I'd sell the green mare. 

I'd keep the nice youngster you backed and keep the young good rider hacking the new TB to see if he improves.


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