# How do you know when you're ready for your own horse?



## harribea (19 June 2018)

I dreamt of having a pony as a child but it was never an option for me, so when my daughter asked for riding lessons I was thrilled to have an excuse to get started myself (aged 40!).  I took lessons on and off for a couple of years, I bought a couple of miniature Shetlands for us to care for at home (with a view to driving at some point) and then last year I took a part-loan on a horse.  I'm not a confident rider but I love it and both me and my daughter have had a real bonding experience with it all.  

So, I was happily taking care of this horse all winter (with very limited opportunities to ride) and then, in the new year, we all agreed to move her to a new yard on full livery.  The owner is an amazing instructor and with more time to ride I really feel like my riding is starting to come together (hoping to do my first dressage test this autumn), but I'm a sloooow learner and I'm never going to be great lol.

Completely out of the blue, the owner has asked if I'd like to buy her.  I was so excited I thought I would burst, but I'm very conscious that I need to make a sensible decision for us and for the horse.  She's lovely and very well-mannered but she's also capable of much more than we can do, so is it fair for us to take her or should she have the opportunity for more challenge? 

And how do you know when you're ready??


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## Horsekaren (19 June 2018)

harribea said:



			I dreamt of having a pony as a child but it was never an option for me, so when my daughter asked for riding lessons I was thrilled to have an excuse to get started myself (aged 40!).  I took lessons on and off for a couple of years, I bought a couple of miniature Shetlands for us to care for at home (with a view to driving at some point) and then last year I took a part-loan on a horse.  I'm not a confident rider but I love it and both me and my daughter have had a real bonding experience with it all.  

So, I was happily taking care of this horse all winter (with very limited opportunities to ride) and then, in the new year, we all agreed to move her to a new yard on full livery.  The owner is an amazing instructor and with more time to ride I really feel like my riding is starting to come together (hoping to do my first dressage test this autumn), but I'm a sloooow learner and I'm never going to be great lol.

Completely out of the blue, the owner has asked if I'd like to buy her.  I was so excited I thought I would burst, but I'm very conscious that I need to make a sensible decision for us and for the horse.  She's lovely and very well-mannered but she's also capable of much more than we can do, so is it fair for us to take her or should she have the opportunity for more challenge? 

And how do you know when you're ready??
		
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I dont think you do know truly. I loaned on weekends and thought owning would be great but it isnt at all the same. 

I took the plunge a year and a half ago and the journey has been quiet something, im often ridiculed on here when asking for advise as i wasn't really expecting to have to cope with so much as a first time owner, horses were suppose to be easy and you were unlucky if they wasn't perfect and needed vets ect (thats what i thought)  lol how wrong i was!

Having said all of the above i wouldnt change it for the world. My horse has taught me so much its incredible. He isn't easy and you honestly cant give him an inch but now we have overcome our struggles we have a lovely relationship. I went through a phase of crying every day for a month in winter to now watching the clock until its time to go and see him as he is just wonderful. 

As for his capabilities, yes he can do so much more than i can offer but i know for a fact he isnt grazing in the field thinking o i wish mum would hurry up and compete me in novice dressage, or take me show jumping every weekend. We do what we can, mix it up and all i ask of him is about 40 mins of work 4 times a week and the rest of his time he gets to chill and enjoy just being a horse.

Good luck with your decision!


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## HeyMich (19 June 2018)

harribea said:



			I dreamt of having a pony as a child but it was never an option for me, so when my daughter asked for riding lessons I was thrilled to have an excuse to get started myself (aged 40!).  I took lessons on and off for a couple of years, I bought a couple of miniature Shetlands for us to care for at home (with a view to driving at some point) and then last year I took a part-loan on a horse.  I'm not a confident rider but I love it and both me and my daughter have had a real bonding experience with it all.  

So, I was happily taking care of this horse all winter (with very limited opportunities to ride) and then, in the new year, we all agreed to move her to a new yard on full livery.  The owner is an amazing instructor and with more time to ride I really feel like my riding is starting to come together (hoping to do my first dressage test this autumn), but I'm a sloooow learner and I'm never going to be great lol.

Completely out of the blue, the owner has asked if I'd like to buy her.  I was so excited I thought I would burst, but I'm very conscious that I need to make a sensible decision for us and for the horse.  She's lovely and very well-mannered but she's also capable of much more than we can do, so is it fair for us to take her or should she have the opportunity for more challenge? 

And how do you know when you're ready??
		
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How exciting!

The horse really doesn't mind not reaching higher challenges and doing fancier footwork - all she wants to do is eat grass and hang out with her horsey mates!

You know the horse well, she has a nice temperament, and you are confident handling her - I think these are all things that are vital with a first horse, and you are lucky that you know her already. It sounds like you are aware of the other bits and bobs to do with horse ownership as you've got the ponies already, so the ridiculous hidden costs won't be so much of a surprise either!

Let us know what you decide xx


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## harribea (19 June 2018)

Horsekaren said:



			I dont think you do know truly. I loaned on weekends and thought owning would be great but it isnt at all the same. 

I took the plunge a year and a half ago and the journey has been quiet something, im often ridiculed on here when asking for advise as i wasn't really expecting to have to cope with so much as a first time owner, horses were suppose to be easy and you were unlucky if they wasn't perfect and needed vets ect (thats what i thought)  lol how wrong i was!

Having said all of the above i wouldnt change it for the world. My horse has taught me so much its incredible. He isn't easy and you honestly cant give him an inch but now we have overcome our struggles we have a lovely relationship. I went through a phase of crying every day for a month in winter to now watching the clock until its time to go and see him as he is just wonderful. 

As for his capabilities, yes he can do so much more than i can offer but i know for a fact he isnt grazing in the field thinking o i wish mum would hurry up and compete me in novice dressage, or take me show jumping every weekend. We do what we can, mix it up and all i ask of him is about 40 mins of work 4 times a week and the rest of his time he gets to chill and enjoy just being a horse.

Good luck with your decision!
		
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Thanks, Horsekaren.  I love how you describe the journey you've been on with your horse.  I have a strong attachment to this one but I know there'll be lots of ups and downs ahead if I buy her, and I actually quite like the thought of that.  I feel like I learn from her every time I'm with her.  I just want the best for her.  You made me laugh at myself, as I'm imagining her getting sniffy about my riding when actually she seems pretty happy! Even the owner said that, although she'd intended her for competing, she thinks it's more important that she's well loved and she knows we'll look after her.  Think I'm excited and scared in equal measure!


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## harribea (19 June 2018)

HeyMich said:



			How exciting!

The horse really doesn't mind not reaching higher challenges and doing fancier footwork - all she wants to do is eat grass and hang out with her horsey mates!

You know the horse well, she has a nice temperament, and you are confident handling her - I think these are all things that are vital with a first horse, and you are lucky that you know her already. It sounds like you are aware of the other bits and bobs to do with horse ownership as you've got the ponies already, so the ridiculous hidden costs won't be so much of a surprise either!

Let us know what you decide xx
		
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Hi HeyMich, thanks for being so encouraging - it's great to feel like the hard work we've put in has resulted in good things - because we are now confident with her and everyone thinks it's a good match.  My ponies have taught me sooooooo much and I'm so glad I got them.  They're a pair of little monkeys and I adore them.

My husband says this is like going to see a kitten - 'there's no going back from here'.  Yikes!!!


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## hopscotch bandit (20 June 2018)

harribea said:



			Hi HeyMich, thanks for being so encouraging - it's great to feel like the hard work we've put in has resulted in good things - because we are now confident with her and everyone thinks it's a good match.  My ponies have taught me sooooooo much and I'm so glad I got them.  They're a pair of little monkeys and I adore them.

My husband says this is like going to see a kitten - 'there's no going back from here'.  Yikes!!!
		
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You have the experience of horse ownership having had your shetlands so this has given you a good grounding, and the mare you are thinking of buying sounds great so I would go for it.  Just remember that a horse will cost more than shetlands with shoeing, insurance and feed/hay so bear this in mind and always have a contingency fund - horses are very good at self harming.

Make sure you get your horse insured from the day you buying.

Best of luck! Enjoy.


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## Embo (20 June 2018)

You're in a really fortunate position in that you know the horse and have known her for some time, so there will be no surprises there. The only advice I can offer at this stage is just make sure you can afford the additional and full cost. Speak to the horse's current owner and ask what exactly she costs to keep each month. 

If you can afford it, I say go for it! Best of luck


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## HeyMich (20 June 2018)

harribea said:



			Hi HeyMich, thanks for being so encouraging - it's great to feel like the hard work we've put in has resulted in good things - because we are now confident with her and everyone thinks it's a good match.  My ponies have taught me sooooooo much and I'm so glad I got them.  They're a pair of little monkeys and I adore them.

My husband says this is like going to see a kitten - 'there's no going back from here'.  Yikes!!!
		
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Yeay! Sounds like a done deal! 

I'd still recommend getting her vetted, as you don't want any nasty surprises (not that a vetting will really show up any internal/disease issues, just their physical soundness on the day), and make sure you ask the current owner every question you can think of before you hand money over. Will they still be on hand to offer advice/lessons etc? And will you keep the horse at the current yard or move her home? 

Very exciting!


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## hopscotch bandit (20 June 2018)

HeyMich said:



			Yeay! Sounds like a done deal! 

I'd still recommend getting her vetted, as you don't want any nasty surprises (not that a vetting will really show up any internal/disease issues, just their physical soundness on the day), and make sure you ask the current owner every question you can think of before you hand money over. Will they still be on hand to offer advice/lessons etc? And will you keep the horse at the current yard or move her home? 

Very exciting!
		
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I agree with HeyMich about the vetting.  And OP, sorry to bring you back down to earth with a crash as I really do have my fingers and toes crossed for you but ..... you need to also consider what you will do if, in the unlikely case, she fails the vetting. You can't let your heart rule your head because doing this can end up costing thousands in the long run, so you need to put your sensible head on if this situation arises. I am sure she won't fail but its something to bear in mind.

Do keep us updated - I can almost feel your excitement through the internet!


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## scats (20 June 2018)

How exciting! 
Im not really sure how you know if you are ready as Ive been lucky enough to have ponies since I was little.  However, you sound like you are going into this with your eyes open and the fact that you know this horse and currently loan her is even better as you wont have to go through the getting-to-know each other stage that often causes hiccups!

It might be worth having her vetted though, and preparing yourself just in case anything major crops up that might be a game changer.

As others have said, the horse wont care if its not out doing as much as it could potentially do.  Horses are very simple creatures- they want food, time with friends and to feel safe.  They have no idea if they are a fantastic horse under saddle, or if they are capable of winning everything, they are just a horse.  
The riding is just the bit that we want!

Good luck with whatever you decide OP x


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## harribea (20 June 2018)

Wow - thank you so much for all your support and encouragement!  I was nervous about posting on here but everyone has been really positive and I'm so grateful for the advice.  I'm a real believer that you learn every day and I know I'll enjoy that aspect of it - and I'm lucky to have the support around me.

Thanks for the vetting tip - I'll make sure I do that, and I will try to keep my head in charge (not easy)!  It's the YO who gives me lessons so that would continue, and the current owner lives within walking distance, we get on well and she's said she'd be happy to support the transition. 

You've all really helped me here, as I'm realising that I am ready - it's the confidence that's the problem - so the biggest hurdle is the financial commitment... which should be manageable but needs some planning.

I'm so glad I joined this forum.  Thank you!!


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## AFB (21 June 2018)

Personally I don't think you've ever 'ready' - it will be a massive learning curve for almost everyone.

What I would say is that ensure you have the funds behind you to back up any inexperience - i.e. if you're not fully clued up on care - do you need day to day help, if so are full/part livery in budget? Do you need weekly/regular lessons or are you capable of riding independently? Are you first aid savvy or will a vet callout be needed for fairly minor occurances? 

You don't want to end up in a situation where your riding suffers, your horse suffers and you end up stone cold broke!


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## harribea (26 June 2018)

Thanks AFB.  Good advice - I've been talking with the YO about it.  The owner of isn't in a rush to sell so we're going to work towards it gradually.  She's said we can go in whenever we like (rather than the 3-4 times pw we do currently) so we're going to see how much we can do and work on our riding over the summer.  If al goes well, we're going to go for it....  



AFB said:



			Personally I don't think you've ever 'ready' - it will be a massive learning curve for almost everyone.

What I would say is that ensure you have the funds behind you to back up any inexperience - i.e. if you're not fully clued up on care - do you need day to day help, if so are full/part livery in budget? Do you need weekly/regular lessons or are you capable of riding independently? Are you first aid savvy or will a vet callout be needed for fairly minor occurances? 

You don't want to end up in a situation where your riding suffers, your horse suffers and you end up stone cold broke!
		
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## SandstromRog (6 July 2018)

That's a difficult question. It depends whether you have the knowledge to feed, ride and deal with a horse; the space; and the money. I would say that once you feel ready to own a horse, and you have ridden horses and you have the money, the most important is how you feel dealing with an animal like a horse without any help. Even if the horse is a good quiet animal, you must be able to understand it. I must also say that you learn that while doing it, so go ahead if you feel like that, but be careful with your first one. Otherwise you will start to unlike to own a horse. I hope that never happen.


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