# Help! Before we make a mistake :-)



## MrsBrowny (26 August 2014)

Hi,

This is my first post so please be kind 

We've just started loaning a pony for my daughter. The pony is 1) a mare 2) an Arab/welsh cross and 3) only 8 years old so I was NOT expecting a plod, however our first few days have not been a enjoyable as I would have hoped.

On the ground her manners aren't bad at all; she's kept at our house so we've been tying her up to the garage wall to groom etc and she's not phased by much. Yesterday I thought I would tack her up and walk her around the house and fields just so she started to get used to things.....well what a mistake! She started off fine so after 15 mins we put my daughter on, straight away the ears were back and the eyes were rolling. She then started whinnying and rearing - horrible for my 9 year old but she managed to stay on and have another walk so the pony didn't think that was the end of the ride.

I think there are 2 issues - 1 is that we also have a 2 year old cob stallion from the same yard as the loan pony, who was supposed to be staying for a couple of weeks to help her settle into our yard. He seems to have a very negative effect on her though - she'll stand tied beautifully but as soon as he hears something and starts neighing, she goes nuts too.

The other possibility is that we've been a bit duped....I knew she could be a little green but I don't trust her at all which is obviously a problem. I haven't owned a horse since I was 18 and sincehavingmy kids I haven't even had that much to do with them, apart from healing out at the riding school when the children were having lessons.

She seems like a lovely pony otherwise so what should we do? Send her back to the owner straight away? Or try and do more? I'm planning on lunging her later to see how she goes - she has so much energy and is overweight as her owners had her on pony nuts and chaff but I've stopped giving her any feed in case it was contributing to the fizz.

Thans in advance for any advice!!x


----------



## Antw23uk (26 August 2014)

My first reaction to your post would be to advise you either send her back or livery her at a yard where you can get the support you very much need day to day because I think you are out of your depth already. I would then be calling in a suitable instructor to progress the ridden relationship. How big is the mare? She sounds like a bit too much already for a 9yr old or is that just me?

Sorry to be so blunt but this does not sound like its going to end well!

Will she be on her own when the stallion goes back? It sounds like she wont have this and I don't blame her. Horses aren't meant to be on their own in my opinion. It sounds like you might not have asked enough or judged enough if they have sent you off with a flighty mare and a stallion for company ... that's just a mix I wouldn't have said worked unless you are experienced and want to use her as a broodmare?, I would be concerned if I were you and I'm sure others will come along with some sound advice.

Good luck.


----------



## honetpot (26 August 2014)

You have a double whammy, a young pony in a strange place and a colt which will not like being left on its own so is bound to whinny to its only friend when its left. It you want to give it  a bit longer send back the colt and see if the mare will settle on her own with extra attention from you, split her hay into several meals so everytime she sees you she associates you with something nice. Not ideal keeping any pony on their own but some will settle with human company, we had our old pony for short periods at home over the summer and after a few whinnys was more interested in the grass, but be prepared to send it back.


----------



## MrsBrowny (26 August 2014)

Hi, thanks for the replies. The pony is 13hh and otherwise great for my 9 year old to do. When we went to see her she was a litte forward going as had come straight from a few weeks without work, she was still more than mangeable for my daughter though.

We live very rurally so there are plenty of horses in adjoining fields,& longer term I am looking at buying a happy hacker for myself anyway so even if she was alone for a while it wouldn't be forever.

A good friend is a classical trainer with 30 years experience and she is coming down at the weekend to give me her opinion, my daughter has been having lessons from her for years and the plan was for her to continue with that on the new pony.

I will call the owner and see if they will take the colt back asap...with the mare I don't know if I'm expecting too much from her after not being here very long - or if she is just a monkey!

We didn't have a vettng or ask as much as we normally would because it was a loan rather than a sale - wish we had now!


----------



## be positive (26 August 2014)

Who in their right mind would send a colt to be company for a mare, is there any chance the owners have kept them together in which case the mare may well be in foal just to add to the situation, I would send it back pronto as it is likely to be making her far more unsettled many mares will be permanently on edge if a colt is close by. 
If there is any question that the mare is not going to be suitable then probably send her back as well and look for a more experienced pony from a sensible PC home that will be a proven first pony, they can all be challenging when moving but this sounds as if it may be too much for your daughter to be able to enjoy and that is what it is all about.


----------



## oldie48 (26 August 2014)

Exactly my thoughts. I also think it's a big responsibility to have an entire especially if you have other horses in the vicinity.  



be positive said:



			Who in their right mind would send a colt to be company for a mare, is there any chance the owners have kept them together in which case the mare may well be in foal just to add to the situation, I would send it back pronto as it is likely to be making her far more unsettled many mares will be permanently on edge if a colt is close by. 
If there is any question that the mare is not going to be suitable then probably send her back as well and look for a more experienced pony from a sensible PC home that will be a proven first pony, they can all be challenging when moving but this sounds as if it may be too much for your daughter to be able to enjoy and that is what it is all about.
		
Click to expand...


----------



## MerrySherryRider (26 August 2014)

I cannot believe this is real. Sorry OP, it kind of defies credibility.


----------



## Wiz201 (26 August 2014)

An entire colt with a mare? Oh lord. Another thought is that she could be in season?


----------



## FestiveFuzz (26 August 2014)

be positive said:



			Who in their right mind would send a colt to be company for a mare, is there any chance the owners have kept them together in which case the mare may well be in foal just to add to the situation, I would send it back pronto as it is likely to be making her far more unsettled many mares will be permanently on edge if a colt is close by. 
If there is any question that the mare is not going to be suitable then probably send her back as well and look for a more experienced pony from a sensible PC home that will be a proven first pony, they can all be challenging when moving but this sounds as if it may be too much for your daughter to be able to enjoy and that is what it is all about.
		
Click to expand...

This! I'd be inclined to send them both back and look for something more suitable.


----------



## lastchancer (26 August 2014)

An entire colt and a green mare for your 9 year old? Do you not like your daughter very much? 
Send them both back asap and get an old school master pony for your girl to gain confidence on.


----------



## luckyoldme (26 August 2014)

Theres loads of stuff going on here which  could be making this situation dangerous for you. It is very irresponsible of anyone to pass this explosive mare/colt combination on to a first time owner. In all fairness to the mare a new home and nervous first time owner can be a toxic combination too. I m only speaking from my own experience of buying my first horse...he scared the living daylights out of me! I wouldn t ride or do anything drastic till your friend has been over...but i would be thinking about getting the colt away as soon as possible. Hope im not being patronising... these are just my own musings.


----------



## MrsBrowny (26 August 2014)

MerrySherryRider said:



			I cannot believe this is real. Sorry OP, it kind of defies credibility.
		
Click to expand...

Haha fair point - I wish I was making it up!

We talked about the possibility of bringing a field companion for the first few weeks but it wasn't until they arrived that we found out he was intact! I did worry about them but she goes berserk anytime he's near her so he'd be brave to really try it I suppose.

I've spoken to the owner and they're going to come and collect him asap. I said that at the moment the mare is coming across as a maniac which they assured me she isn't - so we'll see when she's on her own I guess.

Like I said I knew she was a little green and out of work - I'm happy to admit I may have underestimated just how much on both counts! Thanks for the comments - it's hard to know what is 'normal' for a new pony on a new yard and what is just the wrong pony.


----------



## MrsBrowny (26 August 2014)

Just seen the last two replies.

I do like my daughter haha....she is not nervous as a rider in the slightest - started riding mysister's pony at 3 and has been pony clubbing through her riding school for the past 3 years doing working hunter trials etc. Which is partly the reason we didn't want to loan or buy an old schoolmaster as the chances are we'd have been saying goodbye to him fairly quickly when she was ready to move on.

It's not that I'm massively inexperienced, just out of practice like I said having not done much since I sold mine 9 years ago (I've also realised I'm much more protective of my children than I am of myself!). But all advice helps


----------



## luckyoldme (26 August 2014)

Going by my own experience a horse can behave totally differently with a more nervous person to what they do for someone more confident. Im no great experienced horse woman but i know my horse and how he ticks. For anyone who s not confident he can be quite intimidating. I still feel nervous around horses i dont know..it probably takes me longer than most to trust a horse enough to relax.


----------



## MrsBrowny (26 August 2014)

luckyoldme said:



			Going by my own experience a horse can behave totally differently with a more nervous person to what they do for someone more confident. Im no great experienced horse woman but i know my horse and how he ticks. For anyone who s not confident he can be quite intimidating. I still feel nervous around horses i dont know..it probably takes me longer than most to trust a horse enough to relax.
		
Click to expand...

I'm probably the same. My last horse was a 16.2 warm blood cross and he was a head case! I learned not to bring friends home from school to ride him as he terrified them - but I kne what was messing about and what was serious so I never worried.

Now I understand how my poor old mum felt watching him spin round and round with me hanging on for dear life in the middle of dressage tests!


----------



## showpony (26 August 2014)

Not a critisism op but not in a million years would I have considered taking a green and out of work pony for a young child. . its just a recipe for disaster. ... There could be the perfect 15-20 yr old PC pony out there that may be for loan, scour all the PC websites... Otherwise you need to potentially look at a healthy budget and buying something totally safe. . trust me, we have recently bought the most safe honest competition pony for my daughter ... SAFE was top of list and everything else a bonus.. We had short trial and pony was chilled out from day one, not phased by change of environmemt which he had been in for 6 yrs! Vet was totally shocked how low his heart rate was with change of environment. Within 1 week they have been out cantering in open spaces, ( they went for canter in field first day he arrived on trial) hacking down the road and been to compete at a  dressage comp. . NOT cheap but my daughter from day one has been just able to kick on. I could have taken short cut and got something cheap or green etc but never would I want my childs safety to be compromised. IMHO no shortcuts should be taken to ensure a child is going to be looked after on a pony... My daughter is two yrs younger than yours but tbh I'd still he saying same if she was 9.


----------



## Wiz201 (27 August 2014)

showpony said:



			Not a critisism op but not in a million years would I have considered taking a green and out of work pony for a young child. . its just a recipe for disaster. ... There could be the perfect 15-20 yr old PC pony out there that may be for loan, scour all the PC websites... Otherwise you need to potentially look at a healthy budget and buying something totally safe. . trust me, we have recently bought the most safe honest competition pony for my daughter ... SAFE was top of list and everything else a bonus.. We had short trial and pony was chilled out from day one, not phased by change of environmemt which he had been in for 6 yrs! Vet was totally shocked how low his heart rate was with change of environment. Within 1 week they have been out cantering in open spaces, ( they went for canter in field first day he arrived on trial) hacking down the road and been to compete at a  dressage comp. . NOT cheap but my daughter from day one has been just able to kick on. I could have taken short cut and got something cheap or green etc but never would I want my childs safety to be compromised. IMHO no shortcuts should be taken to ensure a child is going to be looked after on a pony... My daughter is two yrs younger than yours but tbh I'd still he saying same if she was 9.
		
Click to expand...

Great success story, good advice


----------



## poiuytrewq (27 August 2014)

Hi OP, Like the others id be sending the colt home for sure (like now!) he's making the problems so much worse!
I dont think this is your fault at all. I'm guilty or similar- we took on a loan horse for my daughter and i'll be honest i figured the loaners would be honest about every thing due to the fact i would obviously just take him home if anything went wrong?!- When i loaned my horse i made sure i pointed out every tiny detail as it was in my best interests he was in the correct home so its easy to assume all owners would look at things the same way? Said horse bronced my daughter off quite severely the second day she got on him.
Your little mare might be totally different without a calling colt around, Can you maybe borrow a more suitable companion? Something that is happy to be left and wont call to the mare whilst your trying to do things with her?

Ive just saved madly and bought what so far seems the perfect horse for my daughter- he's a little older, been there and done it sort and worth every penny. *touch wood!* 

Good luck, I hope you work it all out x


----------



## LaurenBay (27 August 2014)

So if the colt goes back, the mare will be completely alone?

Whilst I agree the colt going is for the best. Your mare will need a friend. I would go for another mare.


----------



## Fides (27 August 2014)

Has the mare been scanned/blood tested to see if she is pregnant?


----------

