# Losing my bottle



## Geezakiss (2 January 2015)

I know this is probably a common problem but it would be nice to get some encouragement. 

I bought a beautiful horse two months ago, she really is a sweetheart. However ever since I feel like my confidence is slowly going downhill. She is hard to bridle up, she throws her head up high (she's 17hh). It takes two or three of us to get her bridle on. This obviously puts me on edge before I've even started. I still have lessons on her but it all seems to go to pot when I am alone with her. She doesn't listen to my aids and I get scared to push myself. I end up a shaking quivering wreck and cut our session off early. I think if I could tackle the bridle problem it would boost my confidence. Last week I did manage to get it on by myself and afterwards we had a lovely little hack and I felt so happy. But now it's all just went back to the way it was before. Apart from this issue she really is a diamond, her stable manners are impeccable and she has a lovely personality.


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## Equi (2 January 2015)

You need to do some work in lowering her head and accepting the bridle. Where did she come from? Did she have this issue when you viewed her? How is she to put a head collar on?


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## Geezakiss (2 January 2015)

Thanks for the reply. 

She was on working livery at the stables she is still kept at, though I have taken her off working livery. According to her last owner she has always thrown her head up however her last owner was 6ft tall so it wasn't as difficult for her to get her head back down. Other people at the stables say that she was ok at getting her bridle on before I took her on, however I have seen the way some of the weekend girls tack up and they are extremely rough in my opinion. I am beginning to think that because I am not rough she is taking advantage of a weak spot of mine.


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## Equi (2 January 2015)

Well you sound like you have a lower confidence anyway, so its possible. But a horse should not throw its head up to avoid the bridle. Has she had checks done on teeth/back and what bit is in at the moment? 

How is she to put a head collar on? 

If not, in the mean time work on lowering her head. Put your hat on and start doing some pressure and release movements with the head collar, eventually start going down on your haunches a bit, and same thing pressure release. Eventually a commaned like..."down" will bring her head down.


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## Geezakiss (2 January 2015)

I had her teeth checked about a month ago and she needed them rasped, turned out she hadn't had them checked since beginning of summer 2013! She's absolutely fine getting her Headcollar on. I Kept it on to lower her head last week and it worked, now she just uses more force to throw her head back. It's getting to the point where I am on the verge of tears just trying to get a bridle on.


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## flirtygerty (2 January 2015)

Poor mare reminds me of my lad, 17 2hh and does'nt like his ears touched or teeth done, both dentist and vet think he had a very bad experience with a dentist, I am using NH methods with him, scratching up his neck towards his ears, if he stands still, I stop, I often put my hand over his nose as if I was bridling him, rub his cheek gently and let him go, although he is usually ok to bridle, I know he has been ear twitched in the past, but his teeth were in a horrible state, causing head nodding, it's the one thing he trusts no-one on, anything else he's like a dog, I use the word 'relax' when he tenses and we are getting there, but with this lad his fear goes deep, so it's a long road


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## Orangehorse (2 January 2015)

If you can get the headcollar on that is a good start, as at least you know it isn't an ear problem (had one of those!).

Have you tried simply offering something nice at the same time as the bit?  Like a Polo, or a handful of food, or a sugar lump.  The old fashioned way to introduce the bit was to smear it with Golden Syrup.

However, it sounds more ingrained than this and although I can't offer any direct experience, I think you have got to tackle it from a NH point of view - an alternative to just trying to grab hold of his head and cling on until you can get the bit in.  The horse will have to learn to lower his head when you want and to find that the experience of having the bit in is a nice one and not an opportunity for a battle.  

You need to look for advice from people like Monty Roberts, Kelly Marks, Michael Pearce, Richard Maxwell, Linda Tellington-Jones and so on.

You need to man up a bit too.  Remember that every time you handle your horse you are training it.  The horse needs you to be a leader and a teacher, not a quivering wreck.  You can ride it and you say that she is nice to handle, treat her as though you are her teacher and she is your pupil, so although you love her, she has to do as she is told.  If you are nervous it is going to make her nervous, and think that if you are not taking charge, she will have to.  Also one more thing "the boss horse is the one that makes the other horse move its feet."


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## Equi (3 January 2015)

What bit are you using? 

If the head collar is fine then they know what the bridle is - horses are not stupid at all. You will need to try all the usual avenues of back, saddle, girth, even bridle for comfort. My old cob went mad for a while, turned out the brow band on his bridle was too tight. New full size, new horse. (until he went lame a year later  )

If you have a good friend you can trust to hold her, try riding her about with no bridle (a head collar obv but no bit) to see if it makes any difference? If you are nervous you will be holding her too tight and she may not like it.


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## Carlosmum (3 January 2015)

Can you 'practice by just putting the bridle on without the bit initially giver her lots of praise and encourage her to lower her head once its on.  Clicker training might help.  Once you have mastered this hang the bit from one side and bring it into her mouth and out again, as others have said treacle, syrup or honey might help.  It will take time and patience and trust.
good luck


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## Orangehorse (3 January 2015)

I think start with this.  You can get some bridles that have a clip-on for the bit, (e.g. some endurance/trec bridles, or training bridles) so you could put the bridle on first, and then get the bit in and clip it to the bridle.

Needs some lateral thinking!

Is the horse quiet to lunge?  Why not try without a bit, starting on the lunge in an enclosed space.  If you do this, also have a neck strap, and use this as brakes and steering.  Can be really fun and very revealing (see Linda Tellington-Jones).


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## Shay (3 January 2015)

I've had a couple of horses who did this - for different reasons.

My shire x TB was just over 17hh and had been on working livery - this was a few years ago now.  He did it because he could and no-one could reach him.  He found it an excellent way to get out of work - but also I suspect that others might have been a bit rough with him which probably didn't help.  I used to stand on a box and just plan for some time.  We'd happily stand there having a chat until he got bored and put his head down.  But there was no real element of fear or resistance or panic or anything in his behavior.  It was just "reach me if you can...".

The second was my daughter's ISH SJ'er who became very difficult to bridle - to the extent he would lash out with his front legs.  We never knew what caused it - he came to us a sensitive lad and we must have inadvertently reminded him of something.  Or he was just taking advantage of us as new ponies sometimes do.  Tack / teeth / back checks etc were all normal - but there was fear / pain in his reaction.  We found we could un clip the bit and get the rest of the bridle on fairly easily - although we did have to start with building the whole thing piece by piece on him.  Then we just progressed over about 8 months I think to the extent that he could be bridled more or less normally.

You can get clip cheek pieces for any bridle over the internet - I get ours from ebay.  Just bear in mind the bit sits a little lower with the clip than normally.

I know it is hard when you are scared.  Ben never bothered me but the SJ'er did - and still does to an extent and we've had him nearly 3 years!  But slow steps.  Lots of treats.  You will get there.


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## Pearlsasinger (3 January 2015)

The poor mare is trying to tell you something - and you are not listening!

I have had a Clydesdale mare who had been in RS and because she was so big the girls there had hung off her ears to put the bridle on.  She learned that we would not hurt her and got so that she would lower her head for the bridle - treats are very useful for this!

My current mare used to bite her previous owners, I bought her with tack and soon found that the reason she bit was that the browband was too short and squeezed her ears.  A properly fitted bridle has made the world of difference to her and now she will happily wear fancy dress costumes attached to the head-piece, she hasn't bitten me once.

You need to stop getting a gang together to bridle her, instead of planning to ride and so getting frustrated when it takes so long to tack up that there is no riding time left, plan to practise putting her bridle on by yourself, do it in tiny steps with treats to reward her for the smallest success and finish each session on a good note.  Expect it to take several sessions before you can put on the bridle, complete with bit, without any problem

Good luck!


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## Exploding Chestnuts (3 January 2015)

Is there no one in the yard who is good with handling horses [not always the "miss know-it-all"]
I agree you should not have more than one person in the stable.
If the people who work there are rough,  I would be findng someone from outside, probably a BHSII instructor who breaks horses, she is more likely to help you.
It may be the bit, a sore mouth,  or the rough treatment, one can't be sure, but an experienced person is more likely to determine if she is taking the pixel or is sore/scared.
Do stop struggling with trying to reach up, ask her to come down, carrot stretches help. Warm a steel bit on a cold day [maybe needs a different bit]  and have a treat ready. 
Do you know how to put a bridle on sympathetically ........... a lot of people do not understand that they need to hold it in one hand forming a triangle, right hand on top of nose, then slip the bit in with the fingers of the left hand. You may have to start of with breaking the bridle as others said.
Do try to make time to groom her and never ever try to rush things.


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## SpringArising (3 January 2015)

Have you made sure that the bridle itself is comfortable for her?

So many people have them far too tight/put them on rough/clonk their teeth etc. 

At what point does she raise her head? As soon as you put it on or as you're trying to get the bit in?

Have you tried a happy mouth? She may not like the feel of cold metal.

I always offer a treat in exchange for an 'open mouth', which has always worked well. I rest the bit on my hand along with a treat, and as the horse opens its mouth for the treat I gently press the bit into their mouth. 

They always get a pat after, too.


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## Meowy Catkin (3 January 2015)

Orangehorse said:



			If you can get the headcollar on that is a good start, as at least you know it isn't an ear problem (had one of those!).
		
Click to expand...

I have an ear shy horse (he was ear twitched in the past) and he's fine to headcollar, but cannot have a bridle put on normally as he can't cope with his ears being 'squished'. I have to assemble the bridle on his head and even then, I try to only touch his ears very gently. If he thinks you are going to grab an ear, he chucks his head up and will rear to get away from your hands. I've never grabbed at his ears, but he's still very worried about it. He also needed a bigger browband than his bridle came with as he finds it more comfortable. I have also taken a 'it takes as long as it takes' attitude to bridling him and never get cross or frustrated as it only worries him more. It's funny but as soon as I decided not to make it an issue, he's generally been much better.


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## Geezakiss (3 January 2015)

Thanks everyone for your advice.

Pearlsacarolsingerd, I AM listening to her, hence why I've had her teeth checked, spoken to her previous owner several times, spoken to anyone else who has had contact with her and came here for advice. If I wasn't listening to her then I wouldn't give a monkeys what her problem is, I would just do what the others at the yard have previously done and get her in a headlock, squeeze her nose until she can't breathe and wallop her one when she doesn't comply. 

I don't think its her ears, she does not mind me touching them and scratching and cleaning them. If her previous owner hadn't told me she always done this then I would assume that she was fearful because of previous rough treatment. However another lady at the yard told me that when she was bringing her back into work she was fine getting the bridle on and it's only since I took her on she's started. 

She's fine getting the reins put over her head, she throws her head up when I slip my hand under her head and over her nose holding the bridle.


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## Welly (4 January 2015)

Don't worry lots of horses do this and most horses try something on with a new owner. As you said her last owner had no problems because she was 6ft tall we'll make yourself 6ft tall, get a strong box  to stand on. When you tack up get everything ready put her head against the wall take a deep breath stand on your box and just put the bridle on in one movement then get off the box and give a treat at a lower height, remember she testing you out. Good luck


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## YasandCrystal (4 January 2015)

My WB is 17.1hh and used to be a nightmare with headcollar and bridle so I used a treat system. As soon as he puts his head into the headcollar or bridle he gets a polo. It's definately a win win situation for me as he positively wants to have it on now. I know this won't work for every horse, but he is not grabby for treats, but is food motivated.


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